Military Humor

[neophytediver]

1. No matter how hard they try, you simply can't spell "LOST" without "LT."
2. It's better to piss off the CO than a 1SG. Both can chew your six, but "top" is ultimately in charge of beans and bullets.
3. The more eager you are to volunteer, the worse the detail.
4. If you are unwilling to volunteer, the detail is even worse.
5. "Post Police" is not nearly as cool as it sounds.
6. SPCs forget what it's like to be PV1-PFC the moment they pin on their sham shields.
7. NCOs are more than willing to remind them.
8. So are PV1-PFCs in large groups.
9. When you are an armorer there is no such thing as "not my level to repair" when telling the XO half the weapons are down.
10. Four people to never make mad: Medics, Cooks, Supply SGTs and PAC personnel.
11. You will always go on a road march on a day that you wear new boots.
12. The difficulty to operate a weapons system is indirectly proportional to the intelligence level of the operator.
13. The 10% rule applies and states that you must be at least 10% smarter than the equipment you are attempting to use.
14. Infantry officers can not spell.
15. Never play spades against a mortarman.

 

[neophytediver]

This is a crazy little logo I'm going to put on a T-shirt and a hat when I get home. I made it at work between projects. Hope you guys like it (click on the thumbnail to view the full size image).

That is great 2Tours! But I have to say you inspired me, and as a result, I made the following for you. Thank you for all that you do.

 

[2Tours N Iraq`]

SWEEEEEEET!!!!!!

 

[WaterDawg]

Speaking of lost and LT's, its funny when you see a new butterbar that looks like he's 16, and never been w/ a girl. These guys sometimes get picked on so much by SNCO's and take their revenge later in their careers.

Guys keep up the good work, the water will be waiting when you get back.

 

[Firebrand]

Some more fun for us military members...

 

[neophytediver]

Some more fun for us military members...

Gotta love PVT Murphy!

 

[2Tours N Iraq`]

My first PLF (from an actual jump) was more or less me landing like a sack of rocks with my feet and knees together. Hurt like hell but I got up, packed up my 'chute, and ran the 2 clicks to the rally point at Fryer Drop Zone. Thankfully, the rest of my PLFs when a lot better than that first one.

For those of you that don't know what PLF is, it stands for Parachute Landing Fall. Hindsight being 20/20, any instance where landing and fall occur in the same acronym, good things can't come from the sudden stop at the end of what is probably the most peaceful silence on the way down, especially if you are oscilating (rocking back in forth under your 'chute) like the pendulum of a grandfather clock!

 

[Lil' Irish Temper]

The worst are the guys jumping with the Stinger Missiles, It's horrible to be in the back of the plane and see them go out the door and hear them slamming all the way down the side of the bird. 1st time I heard and saw that, all I could think is these guys are friggin insane.

Chairborne

 

[ozarkjim]

My son-in-law (Ranger) on the phone to my daughter last week "Damn, there goes a cat and I don't have my rifle!" Sorry cat lovers.
Sua Sponte

 

[Squalus]

My first PLF (from an actual jump) was more or less me landing like a sack of rocks with my feet and knees together. Hurt like hell but I got up, packed up my 'chute, and ran the 2 clicks to the rally point at Fryer Drop Zone. Thankfully, the rest of my PLFs when a lot better than that first one.

For those of you that don't know what PLF is, it stands for Parachute Landing Fall. Hindsight being 20/20, any instance where landing and fall occur in the same acronym, good things can't come from the sudden stop at the end of what is probably the most peaceful silence on the way down, especially if you are oscilating (rocking back in forth under your 'chute) like the pendulum of a grandfather clock!

Yeah but have you ever landed on a chicken coup?