Scuba Limericks

[wetrat]

One for Lilfret:

Ol' Carl Brasheers entered a pub
To chug a beer and snarf some grub
SCUBA divers at the bar
Shared adventures near and far
Carl dove naked that night, in his tub

But ol' Carl was a cowboy see, who never took off his boots even in the tub.
He couldn't get his spring straps around his spurs, so he was never able to finish his OW classes.

 

[wetrat]

And the theme resurfaces:

Diver Dave's wife was made of rubber
Not like his ex, a money grubber!
But when it came to diving down
Diver Dave had to frown
She truly was a real landlubber!

 

[Fish_Whisperer]

Oh god... LMAO! These are great!

One who thinks my poems poor
Would quickly change their views
If they compared these rhymes I post
With those I couldn't use.

 

[Fish_Whisperer]

There once was a diver named Dolly
Who by all accounts was quite jolly
She met a cute manta ray
On a dive holiday
And tickled him with a sprig of holly

 

[Bob_B]

There once was a diver named Bob B
I said don't be diving with me
I said with a frown
Underwater I’m a clown
You’ll put that shoe where the sun don’t see

LMAO

 

[PapaBob]

There once was a diver named Moses
Who often confused his air hoses
He attached his main reg
With a high pressure peg
And now lies pushing up roses

 

[PapaBob]

I knew of a diver named Mark
Who wanted to kiss a big shark
He found a great white
And puckered up right
But now swims without head in the dark

 

[Kevfin]

There once was an English diver named Sid
his hobby got all his quid
a young lass he met
quickly became her pet
He traded his diving for a kid.

 

[TheRedHead]

There was a young diver named Andy
who thought himself quite a dandy
He jumped in the sea
at a quarter t'three
Too bad his gear wasn't handy.

 

[TheRedHead]

A dashing young diver named Frank
thought he would pull off a prank
He connected his nose
to his high pressure hose
and gave his tonsils a yank!