Little girls and makeup

[Diving Doc]

Kids should stay kids as long as possible. Making them up to be a beauty queen is not part of growing up at that age.

Im wioth you on this one....regardless if the 16 yo is great in other ways, I want my daughter to have a chilhood and not to be encumbered with all the crap society lays on women nowadays

 

[baitedstorm]

I don't know what was going on in the daycare, but I do know that during the day the teachers are often looking for things that keep the kids engaged. To a 3 year old putting on make up or finger painting is probably pretty much the same thing.

This is probably one of those things that makes parents uncomfortable but to kids, it's just something fun to do. I think we project a lot of our insecurities and fears on our children.

I certainly understand your views Jeff, but where does it stop? What limits should teachers have with our children? I'm sure there was nothing more then good intentions from the three year olds teacher, but good intentions often pave the road to a place I'd rather not visit. Was the child’s welfare jeopardized by a teacher actions... probably not, but does it make it ok to continue without permission from the parent?

I had a situation years ago that made me a very unpopular and very un cool mom to not only the teachers of the daycare, but also to some of the older children. The daycare picked up my daughters from school (ages 5 and 10) and transported them to the daycare facility. One of the teachers were allowing a very popular pop music radio station to be played during their 45 minute ride. Sounds pretty innocent, after all the kids just wanted entertainment. However, when my then five year old came home singing something about "It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes" I almost fainted. I had never heard that song a day in my life so it made things much worse. I immediately thought the worse. Someone is telling my child to take off her clothes because it was hot?????? What the heck..... Now, I'm certain that coming from a law enforcement background, I may be quicker to see the worse in the situation, but man.... that really scared me.

The Director of the daycare apologized, but my daughters mind could not be erased. To her, it was absolutely innocent, just something fun and cool that the bigger kids also enjoyed. The other bus riders weren’t very happy when they could no longer listen to the radio in the van, and thought I was mean. Oh well… If your kids like you ALL of the time, there is a really good chance that you aren’t doing your job as a parent.

I know this is apples and oranges, but I think it brings up an interesting point. There has to be limits in school, weather it's a daycare or a public/private school.

 

[tonka97]

I think we project a lot of our insecurities and fears on our children.

True. So leave the face paint off of children. They don't need the crap slapped on their little faces.

Kids in the US today are the safest most protected kids at any time in human development, so much so, that they now take longer to mature. Recent research shows that 30 or 40 years ago someone was pretty much as mature as they were going to get at 18 or 20. Today the same level of maturity takes about 26 years to attain.

What recent research. This is a bunch of hooey. Plus for whatever reason (hormones in dairy products etc.?) physical maturation for girls occurs MUCH more quickly.

If that had been my daughter Sammi when she was 3, I would have asked her if she liked it and gotten a read on what she really thougtht of it and taken it from there.

How the H*** does a 3 THREE year old toddler know what is a wise decision??? That is so naive I can't believe it!

 

[3GDIVER]

You are not a fuddy duddy!!! My daughters are allowed to play with makeup at home, but NEVER allowed to wear it out of the house. Not sure when they will be allowed to, but I agree that we shouldn't rush kids....let them grow up slowly!! There are plenty of things to do at daycare besides teach kids about makeup!!

 

[redrover]

Hey there are 9 of us now. I wonder how many are that way from experience?
I was allowed to check out a lot of things not recommended for children. And all I can remember is gaining the realization they weren’t something I wanted to do. And I remember the bulk of my class mates did a whole lot of things in the bathroom to alter the parental approved appearance.
Let them play with supervision rather than trust a buddy behind your back knows anything.
There was a thread a while back along this line and I was amazed at how much control people – particularly fathers – thought they had. I don’t see control a solution to raising children, education is a solution.

 

[AmyJ]

Of course, now 11 years old, Sammi is more concerned with her soccer stats (she was just asked to try out for the Olympic Development Program) and getting her advanced open water certification.

Jeff

NOT trying to argue... but for the sake of discussion... growing up, maturity... how is letting a kid play with make up pushing them into maturity too early any more than allowing them the kind of competitive environment and extensive training needed to make a pre-olympic team???? Given the option, I would rather have my kids playing with make up, rather than pushing through the kinds of stress I see the kids enduring in athletics today. And those that do make it... I see interviews with 16 year old olympians who feel like their life is over... they have attained all their goals and dreams and have nothing more to live for... let's talk about pushing kids beyond their childhood... yikes!!!:shakehead

 

[Scuba_Jenny]

i'd have a problem with the makeup too

girls are more than a pretty face. it's never too early to start teaching girls that they are far more than their looks. emphasizing makeup at such an early age just reafirms the message that their identity is all about looking good

eventually, i assume, they'll get into boys and makeup, but at least they'll do that on their own

I am raising my 11yr old daughter (from here on referred to as Hermit Crab) and have allowed her to put make up on--with my guidance. After all I put on makeup for work and of course she is following her mothers footsteps. Included in putting on make up is teaching her WHY it is put on, to enhance a beautiful face, and it should never be put on so that others can see it. It should look natural.
Putting make up on a 3 yr old by somebody else beside a parent is wrong, and no different that a pretend tattoo or candy cigarettes (do they still sell those things?). It is the parent who makes that decision. I refused to allow Hermit Crab to play with it until she was about 7-8 yrs old.

 

[tonka97]

Not only is putting makeup on toddlers a bad idea psychologically but there are serious problems with damaging sensitive skin with the chemicals that compose women's makeup:

http://www.dermatologyinfo.net/english/chapters/chapter21.htm

"A recent US study found that many cosmetics and toiletries used worldwide contained chemicals that were either known cancer-causing agents (carcinogens) or were untested for their effect on human health. More research into the safety of cosmetic chemicals is needed.
In our pursuit of beauty, it is wise to remember that cosmetics can be complex combinations of chemicals. Reading the label and understanding which ingredients are used in a product are helpful when putting on your best face."

Of course, a passive parent may not care enough to protect their toddler.

 

[H2Andy]

I refused to allow Hermit Crab to play with it until she was about 7-8 yrs old.

i thought 3 was much to young ... 7-8 sounds right .. now a days (my wife tells me) probably as early as 5 or 6, since girls get into makeup earlier

but that's if they ask for it, not have it shoved on them like this teacher seems to have done, at 3 ... and like you say, not so she then goes out wearing the make up

 

[AmyJ]

Not only is putting makeup on toddlers a bad idea psychologically but there are serious problems with damaging sensitive skin with the chemicals that compose women's makeup:

http://www.dermatologyinfo.net/english/chapters/chapter21.htm

Of course, a passive parent may not care enough to protect their toddler.

I'll try not to take that personally, as I do everything I can to protect my children... but on the list of dangers in this world... make up would be about the bottom of my list.