I read through this whole thread with interest, though it got a little monotonous at times. I would like to add a few small comments, as a female who is Trimix certified, but dives mostly recreational ( in double 12's):
1) I'm almost 60 and not an athlete. If anyone volunteers to carry my gear, I am very grateful. To lift up my loaded doubles (V-weight, regs, etc) from ground level to the shelf I gear up on at my regular dive club, I always ask some young bucks for assistance. When on my own, the double tanks do not ever get to ground level, because they are inconvenient for me down there. However, I really hate when someone interferes with my setup activities. That usually results in a hose which is not routed correctly, or some other error. I don't think that has happened because I'm female though, just a DM who is trying to be helpful.
2) I have never experienced blatant sexism in the dive world. I feel that I am only limited by the level of confidence that I have in my abilities, and what type of activity I consider too risky or have a desire to participate in. Never by anyone saying that its not a women's dive, or questioning why I am there. However, I only started diving a few years ago. I know that when I entered the professional world as an engineer in the late 1970s, I experienced a lot of discrimination, which I don't think exists so much today. So timing might be the reason that I have not received negative vibes in the dive world.
3) I've been told stories by an instructor who spent time working at a Caribbean resort. He told me that if a pretty girl in an OW class couldn't do all of the skills, for example if she was afraid to remove her mask, they would let it go and be really complimentary to her, in the hopes of scoring with her that evening. I found that really scary, that these young women have unearned C-cards.
Linda