"Good Buddy" or "Dive Natzi" ??????

[iztok]

You CANNOT still be considering that LDS for your children's training!?!? Go elsewhere (Jim's?) if for no other reason than to be sure the LDS understands your concerns! Please do not enable the LDS or your hubby's behavior by continuing to frequent their business, or dive with hubby.

DiveMom, they are right. Pull your money out and go somewhere else. They might be closer in terms of driving distance but we are really talking about human lives here.

 

[adurso]

I copied it from someone's post sometime. Yours? I used it verbatim until someone with better English than mine corrected a word.

Yep, mine, the person who corrected "descry" for you might want to invest in a dictionary. The word means to pry into hidden places, discover things best left undiscovered, it is what makes the quote funny......Use it in good health...

 

[DCBC]

Last weekend I was talking with a Dive Con about our oldest starting OW in a couple of weeks. I asked if buddy/hubby and I could audit the class. He wanted to know why so I explained my hubby had been resort certified in 2 days and had no clue about the "buddy system" about "pre Dive" checks or any kind of self or buddy assistance.

He asked if I had any specifics.. and I explained sever instances where these had been an issue on a dive and could have been much more serious if we hadn't immediatly aborted the dive.

He asked what I expected as a buddy and from a buddy... Well, first and foremost was to be there to precheck equipment, dive plan, communication, emergency procedures.. etc.

He told me that I just wanted to "spoil all the fun of diving" ????

When I told him my buddy/hubby generally took off as soon as we were in the water he called me a dive natzi!! Asking what I expected "What, do you expect him to be in sight on the whole dive!!!" When I responded "YES" he was downright nasty saying that was selfish and evil and he was glad I wasn't his buddy!

Am I waaaaaaaaaaaay off base here? I realize most of my buddy habits were learned from a scientific research team.. but ... does staying within line of viz make me a controling natzi dive buddy???

This has been bugging the heck out of me.. and of course my hubby ate it up! Now he feels justified only making sure we are in the same ocean!

Hi DiveMom,

First of all I wouldn't allow this guy to train my son. Obviously he doesn't have a clue. I teach my students to be within touching distance at all times and will not credit them with any open-water dive where this isn't strictly adhered too. This rule is first introduced when they are still in-the-pool.

Perhaps this is a throw-over from the old days, but good communication and buddy contact has over the years saved many divers, including myself. Perhaps this is analogous to "driver" training. I've been told that you fail a driver's exam if you roll through a stop sign or speed during the test. Same logic. In a buddy pair, you are each others rescuer.

I believe that a SCUBA Instructor has to teach how best to dive. Some people get more slack with the rules as the years go by, but they should at least be taught the "in the perfect world" scenario when they begin their journey.

You never appreciate a buddy more than when you desperately need help. When you do, how far do you want him to be away from you?

 

[iztok]

Hey IZTOC.. I missed you too, besides I could have used the backup with that divecon! LOL Here are my responces:

You have backup from SB on this if that makes a difference

(Not saying that solo diving is an issue but you can't have it both ways, you either commit to buddy system or you dive solo.)

If you really want to pull one on your husband get your kids (and yourself) to UTD.

2. I keep meaning to sigh up extra DAN insurance on him.. just haven't. If he's going to go it will either be a car accident [yes, he drives like he dives] or a diving accident.

I don't drive slow (being European and all but while I am not the best buddy out there I am at least trying and working up my skills to be one. If I happen to lose a buddy at least it is not intentional and I do try to correct it ASAP and work on better skills in the future.

3. Kids are too new for rescue class.. but have at least read the books and watched the videos for both SSI and PADI rescue classes.

They do not have to go straight to rescue class. But just gear their path towards it. Meaning that from OW get them towards AOW and some good specialties (buoyancy - learning better control under water and lessening chances of uncontrolled ascents, nitrox - learning bit more about NDL and reducing the risk of bends while diving air tables, navigation - how to get there and back w/o getting lost).

4. I carry a spare air 3cf all the time. and the kids will get one for Chrismas along with training for it. I also "drag along" my old SSS [surface support station] which is my float with a reel and a 20cf tank and 2 regs hung between 15-20 f depending on the dive when with the kids.

As others said, 3cf is nothing... go for 19cf at least. It is my choice for two factors. It gets me enough air to come up from 60-100ft dive and it is small enough to put it in my carry-on.

There are some threads around but basically quick calculation says that from around 130ft you need over 6cf of air at 30ft/min and at 60ft/min bit more then 3cf. Sure it is better then nothing to have SpareAir but from where it is usable you might as well do CESA. You have 19cf (or 20cf) bottle, sling it instead.

 

[cloudswinger]

So the DiveCon is the father of the LDS owner? I agree, leave the LDS and tell them why. Your husband is reckless, and selfish and basically being immature. He's still mad about having to be rescued from his own actions? He's acting worse than your kids. But since he's an adult, he's in control of his own life. You don't need to be second guessing your decisions. He probably making you feel like a worrywart and a nag. But you're a mom, it's your job to keep your kids safe. And as much as you want to protect the kids, you don't have control over his actions and you're not your husbands mom. Give him the space he wants. Take care of yourself and the kids. Maybe find a club so you both can find appropriate buddies.

 

[Peter Guy]

As a husband who has been accused (quite unfairly I might add) of being a very poor and inconsiderate buddy (see TSandM's post above), I'd like to add my thoughts --- which, for the most part, are absolutely in line with everyone elses.

To try to be a little polite, it sounds like your husband has a fairly strong ego and may, in fact, have some of his masculinity tied up in being in charge -- whether that is diving, driving, whatever. Perhaps the road to success for you and him is not to set him free (that is, give him a pony and say go solo), but to give him a huge challenge. He thinks he's so good? OK, you are SO GOOD you should go to the next step -- get those doubles, go deep, whatever.

And here is the roadmap.

The road starts with GUE's Fundmentals or UTD's Essentials/Rec1. There are some very good instructors in the Bay Area who are so much better than your husband even he may be able to recognize he can learn something from them.

Or you might want to do what I was able to do, take a few "lessons" with one of those "diving gods" who, in the first 5 minutes, showed me how little I knew.

You've tried the "I need you to be a better buddy" method and that didn't work. Perhaps the solution is for you to encourage him to "go play" with some top divers/instructors who will "encourage" him to dive differntly.

 

[Diver0001]

Last weekend I was talking with a Dive Con about our oldest starting OW in a couple of weeks. I asked if buddy/hubby and I could audit the class. He wanted to know why so I explained my hubby had been resort certified in 2 days and had no clue about the "buddy system" about "pre Dive" checks or any kind of self or buddy assistance.

He asked if I had any specifics.. and I explained sever instances where these had been an issue on a dive and could have been much more serious if we hadn't immediadtly aborted the dive.

He asked what I expected as a buddy and from a buddy... Well, first and foremost was to be there to precheck equipme nt, dive plan, communication, emergency procedures.. etc.

He told me that I just wanted to "spoil all the fun of diving" ??t??

When I told him my buddy/hubby generally took off as soon as we were in the water he called me a dive nantzi!! Asking what I expected "What, do you expect him to be in sight on the whole dive!!!" When I responded "YES" he was downright nasty saying that was selfish and evil and he was glad I wasn't his buddy!

Am I waaaaaaaaaaaay off base here? I realize most of my bueddy habits were learned froem a scienific research team.. but ... does stayiwng within line of viz make me a cDe in the same ocean!

I didn't read the other responses, sorry.

If what you're saying went down as you say and if it were me then I would write him off. He's a dolt. You are right. End of discussion.

Oh.... and get your son out of that class and into one with an instructor with a more constructive attitude.... Bad mojo surrounds this situation.

R..

 

[pedo]

What is a dive con?

 

[Diver0001]

a dive con is a Divemaster by another name.

 

[DandyDon]

Yep, mine, the person who corrected "descry" for you might want to invest in a dictionary. The word means to pry into hidden places, discover things best left undiscovered, it is what makes the quote funny......Use it in good health...

Thanks! Fixed!