Scuba Limericks

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There once was an obnoxious diver called Mike
He might save some gas if he decided to ride a bike
He parks like a goof
And laughs at spoof
And if he continues to taunt me I'll have his head on a pike!
 
There once was a diving attorney
Who really loved to take an underwater journey
She dove with the sharks
And discovered a dogfish never barks
Right now she's probably watching a NASCAR tourny....
 
One day I went diving at a jetty
The walk was long and I got pretty sweaty
I was there in search of crab
And many did I grab
So I guess I can quit complaining and being petty...
 
I hate split fins
If I had to wear them I'd cut off my own shins
My buddies may taunt
But my paddle fins I'll flaunt
Wearing split fins is considored one of the greatest sins!
 
I hate divers who natter
The stuff they fuss about really doesn't matter
They squawk and :censored:
If they don't shut up and leave me out of it a hissy I will pitch
Maybe they should go diving instead of sitting in front of computers getting fatter :shakehead
 
If Gidds is bored and left to her own devices she composes scathing limericks
Furthermore she scrutinizes, grumbles, and nitpicks
She writes out her wrath
Nobody is immune from this printed bloodbath
Anybody who crosses Gidds, she verbally kicks!
 
Boy is everybody gonna be sorry they went off and left Gidds alone in the limerick thread
This very thought should fill all hearts with dread...
She is on an evil typing binge
Snickering to herself about how everybody is gonna cringe
As she demonicly composed the words bled....:devil:
 
do it easy:
holy spit Gidds, slow down. You'll limerick yourself out or something.

Hush or I'll compose another one about you :evil:
 
I really love my drysuit
It makes me toasty warm, not cold and slimy like a newt
Drysuit hickies are a bit of a drag
But I generally like diving in a nice dry bag
Furthermore you really cannot beat a stylish rock boot :D
 
https://www.shearwater.com/products/teric/

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