Funniest Diving quotes you have heard

[bowlofpetunias]

Why are several weeks worth of posts in this thread gone?

Are there? probably best to ask a MOD... if a MOD did it... they would have made it clear...

 

[Dave1981]

If not, your tissues are saturated at 1 atmosphere with nitrogen, helium, and whatever trace gases make up air. If you fly, the ambient pressure will be reduced and you'll offgas until you're saturated at that new pressure, or until you land, whichever comes first.

I was about to post a couple but this is a good one Useful advice for those of us that intend to dive before we land

OW Student: "Should we take the Mask for this dive", to which the Instructor said of course, "No, we're not using masks for this dive"

Instructor during briefing "what level are you?"
(proudly)"we're rescue divers"
"Excellent, meaning one in three dives you'll need rescued!"

 

[Cave Diver]

Why are several weeks worth of posts in this thread gone?

There aren't posts missing, it's just been a couple of weeks between some of the posts.

 

[I Dive]

There aren't posts missing, it's just been a couple of weeks between some of the posts.

Your right, I was confusing this with a similar thread

 

[ReefHugger]

One of the funniest that I have seen, was by a SB'er. It is the qoutation they use at the bottom of their post. Really wish I could remember who, so that I could give credit here.
Pure class:

"Think how deep the oceans would be if the didn't have sponges"

Just love it.

 

[ReefHugger]

Sorry - should have read "they didn't have sponges"

 

[ReefHugger]

While I am here, I may as well do another.

About 3 yrs ago, I had a student who had to learn to dive as she was going after her Msc in Marine Biology. Throughout her 5 training dives, she demonstrated a quirk - she just didn't like coming down to the bottom. She was quite comfortable, however, and was never a safety issue - she was just always 5/6ft above the group, circling around (a nuisance to keep an eye on). On many occassions I had to call her down, to show her some interesting critter.

About a yr. later, I ran into one of her lecturers and so enquired.
Me: "how is D.....?"
Lecturer: "Oh, she's fine........I understand her classmates call her satellite"

Wicked students!!

 

[DeputyDan]

WWI was started by Internet posts?

I think is was due to missing posts..................

 

[MMM]

Not as funny as some of these but...

As I was proudly displaying my first C-card to my daughters the younger (13 at the time) one asked why it's a "C" Card....

My older daughter (16 at the time) replied "Because it lets you go in the Sea!"

Because you didn't get an A or a B?

 

[cooperscuba]

Bought my wife a wet-fit macro lens for her camera. After her first dive with the new lens I asked how'd she got on with it. "Fine" she replied, "except I couldn't shoot anything but macro". Why not, I inquired. "Because if I took it off at depth and then replaced it again, the expanding air would probably damaged it"

From a student regarding how to illuminate a compass on a night dive ... swim with the torch in your mouth.