Great thread! Thanks all for the good laughs.
During my AOW class, my buddy who only had about 10 dives was having trouble with his buoyancy; he kept shooting up nearly to the top. Our instructor was assisting him but was also giving him a hard time about it, they were close friends. At the end of the third dive he told our instructor, "I figured out why my buoyancy is so bad today, it’s because I have really bad gas from eating brats and beans last night". I was laughing quite hard from the excuse, then I remembered I had to share a hotel room with him that night.
I was working at a LDS as a ‘fun, weekend gig’. The store always had the pill bugs aka: rolly polly’s laying around. I was vacuuming the floor when I had a customer and his wife come in to get fitted for her OW course. His wife was on the larger side and I had to step her into men’s size wetsuits. As she was trying on a suit, I was standing with another store employee and the customer’s husband. Without thought, I looked at the other employee and said, “Man, there are a lot of rolly polly’s around here”, referring to the bugs. The other employee chuckled and said, “Yeah, I know!” With no hesitation, the customer raised his hands with his pointer figures out and looked at me with the most ,“oh, no you didn’t”, look on his face and asked, “Did you just call my wife a rolly polly?!”. Trying my hardest not to bust out laughing and gather my thoughts to appropriately answer his questions, I explained that the store had a bug issue with rolly pollys and THAT was what I was referring to. He hesitated but was ultimately satisfied with my explanation but it made for a very awkward moment. After that, I removed myself from the floor and allowed the other employee to further assist them. Mouth Open- Insert Foot.
