This is something I have been thinking about. However, it's very common for dive ops to take a boat full of supposedly experienced rec divers to sites that could easily "push recreational limits," with the implicit understanding that although it's a challenging dive you are expected to stay within rec limits, not let your computer go into deco, etc. It would be great if I were to get tec training so that when I dive those wrecks in FL and NC I'm not "on the ragged edge," but I fear if I were to do so I would be severely limiting my choice of dive op to go with, since the majority of trips out to the wrecks I have in mind explicitly limit divers to traditional recreational profiles. I can imagine some dive ops would think it silly, wasteful, etc., if people wanted to do a 30 minute dive on the Spiegel Grove in doubles with trimix and no more than a few minutes of deco. Am I wrong? And what about elsewhere in the world? I've read reports of Truk liveaboards seriously pushing the envelope of "rec"; are there some that accommodate tec divers who want to dive pretty much the same profile as everyone else but just do it with the added safety provided by tec equipment and training?
That said, I have seen it done. There are ops in Key Largo that will mix rec and tec divers on a boat, with the rec divers doing a double-dip on the wreck while the tec divers do a single deco dive. I suppose such dive ops would be fine with a tec-equipped/trained diver's explanation that instead of a single long deco dive he plans to do two much more conservative dives. From what I've seen, I just don't think it's common to mix tec and rec divers on a boat, or to have a boat go out on which everyone is a tec-equipped/trained diver who plans to dive a more or less recreational profile. Or is it more common than I realize?
I understand your problem. If you want to do some light deco diving and are certified to do it, you can have a very hard time finding the opportunity. Many trips seem to be all basic rec or all serious tech, and it's hard to find that in between slot. But it can be done. A lot depends upon the operator and how you prepare ahead of time. Here are some examples.
1. I have done mixed tech and rec trips in Cozumel. I sought out an operator who does this sort of thing regularly (Deep Exposure), made contact well ahead of time to explain my purpose, and worked out a plan. In this case, it so happened that this was my first trip after recovering from pretty bad injuries, so I wanted to ease my way back. I therefore experienced it all. I did some pure recreational diving, then I did some diving with tech gear and some light deco, and then I went full tech. No problem.
2. I have gone on trips in south Florida that were pure recreational other than me and my teammates. The boat crews knew our credentials, knew what we were doing, and were fine with it. We just had to be aware of their dive schedule and not interfere--no 90 minute run times.
3. Yes, some operators will set up a mixed trip, where the tech people do one really long dive while others are doing two dives. I haven't seen that often, but I have seen it.
4. I stay in South Florida for at least a month every winter. The dive operator nearest my condo will do pretty much anything you want provided you make the arrangements ahead of time and have a minimum number of people (not that many) committed to it. They will put your plan on the schedule and see if anyone wants to join. I am sure some other boats will do something similar.
5. In some areas you can get on a mailing list or Meetup group of like minded people who can put together enough people to get an entire boat at no great cost.
6. Yes, In Truk Lagoon you can do deco dives.
7. I put this one last because it is controversial. There was a recent death on a wreck in which two divers had penetrated well into the wreck, using a reel and line for guidance, which is technical wreck diving. The one bringing out the reel didn't make it. The dive briefing before the dive had made it clear that there would be no penetration, and the thread about the death started off with the idea that they had violated the rules. It turned out that the dive operator knew they were going to do that, figured they were good enough to do it, and had let them know that the "no penetration" rule did not apply to them. The problem was that they were neither properly trained nor equipped for that. The story is a good example of why a little learning about tech is a dangerous thing. Either get the full training or stay away. On the other hand, if they had been properly trained and equipped, they probably would have been just fine.
I think the overall lesson is to scout ahead, make some phone calls, and find out what options you have.