VooDooGasMan
Contributor
I found that link of aimee's sister in law around same time, I am just going to stop looking it was a brown website is all I recall and a maritime law one I am pretty sure. moving on.
Scuba Shack's Boat Get Wet Sinks in Key Largo
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LynnB
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UnderSeaBumbleBee
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VooDooGasMan, lay off the voo doo gas man! You were adamant that a guy was dead and told anyone questioning you to move on to current stuff and your subsequent explanations have been lacking and honestly strange.
patmrhoads
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Hi all. I am Pat Rhoads, husband of Aimee Rhoads who died in this incident. Let me begin by saying:
1) I was not at any time on this boat or present during the incident, so I am not in a position to answer any questions about specifics.
2) As someone else posted, the Coast Guard is investigating, and to my knowledge they have not yet released their findings. So I do not have any more information than what has already been made public.
3) I do not plan to post again after this, although I have found reading this conversation string very helpful.
4) Oh, and to be clear, I have read EVERY post in this thread, although some had been deleted by the time I got to them.
What I DID want to say was THANK YOU to all of those who have expressed condolences and sympathy for the death of my wife. I love Aimee very much, and she will be missed by many. Aimee was a counselor/therapist with a nonprofit organization, and used her job as a way to reach out and help people in need. Additionally, she was learning to use new technologies in an effort to help children with autism and people who had suffered brain injury or trauma. Our three year old daughter was the light of Aimee's life. And I can't even begin to tell all of you what an incredible wife, daughter and sister Aimee was to me and her family. At her memorial last Thursday, I spoke to so many of her clients and friends who shared with me what a huge difference Aimee had made in their lives, and what a huge hole her loss leaves. I know how they feel.
Ever since Aimee and I got married five and a half years ago, she'd expressed an interest in scuba diving. This trip was to provide her that chance to do so.
In earlier posts I noticed that some of those posting here have expressed experience with this particular company, boat, or captain. While I am not in any way part of the Coast Guard's investigation, I would ask that anyone who feels they have information that the Coast Guard might find useful to please contact Jeff Fry from the USCG at 305-292-8804, or via email at jeff.a.fry@uscg.mil.
Again, I thank you on behalf of all of Aimee's loved ones for your sympathy and well-wishes. I have seen through this bulletin board what a close-knit community this is, and how much an incident like this affects all of you. That has been both comforting and reassuring to me, because it tells me that in any type of event like this, everyone is likely to analyze it, learn from it, and become a better community for it.
God bless,
-Pat
1) I was not at any time on this boat or present during the incident, so I am not in a position to answer any questions about specifics.
2) As someone else posted, the Coast Guard is investigating, and to my knowledge they have not yet released their findings. So I do not have any more information than what has already been made public.
3) I do not plan to post again after this, although I have found reading this conversation string very helpful.
4) Oh, and to be clear, I have read EVERY post in this thread, although some had been deleted by the time I got to them.
What I DID want to say was THANK YOU to all of those who have expressed condolences and sympathy for the death of my wife. I love Aimee very much, and she will be missed by many. Aimee was a counselor/therapist with a nonprofit organization, and used her job as a way to reach out and help people in need. Additionally, she was learning to use new technologies in an effort to help children with autism and people who had suffered brain injury or trauma. Our three year old daughter was the light of Aimee's life. And I can't even begin to tell all of you what an incredible wife, daughter and sister Aimee was to me and her family. At her memorial last Thursday, I spoke to so many of her clients and friends who shared with me what a huge difference Aimee had made in their lives, and what a huge hole her loss leaves. I know how they feel.
Ever since Aimee and I got married five and a half years ago, she'd expressed an interest in scuba diving. This trip was to provide her that chance to do so.
In earlier posts I noticed that some of those posting here have expressed experience with this particular company, boat, or captain. While I am not in any way part of the Coast Guard's investigation, I would ask that anyone who feels they have information that the Coast Guard might find useful to please contact Jeff Fry from the USCG at 305-292-8804, or via email at jeff.a.fry@uscg.mil.
Again, I thank you on behalf of all of Aimee's loved ones for your sympathy and well-wishes. I have seen through this bulletin board what a close-knit community this is, and how much an incident like this affects all of you. That has been both comforting and reassuring to me, because it tells me that in any type of event like this, everyone is likely to analyze it, learn from it, and become a better community for it.
God bless,
-Pat
Blue Sparkle
Contributor
Pat,
Thank you for your post, and welcome to Scubaboard -- although I'm very, very sorry you are meeting us all for this reason. It would be so much better if it were Aimee coming here to post a happy trip report.
We do find ourselves getting involved when someone from our Scuba-driving fraternity is in an accident or incident. Although the conversations can sometimes get a bit intense, that's because we do care. We care about our fellow divers, and too, we know it could be us - or a buddy - and we want to find out what happened and learn from it if we can. I'm glad you recognized that and weren't offended.
Your blog was linked to in this thread and it's clear from reading it what a wonderful family you are, and that you and your daughter have a supportive community around you.
Again, thank you for making the effort to come here and post.
Blue Sparkle
PS: If you do by any chance find yourself wanting to post here again, please feel welcome to.
Thank you for your post, and welcome to Scubaboard -- although I'm very, very sorry you are meeting us all for this reason. It would be so much better if it were Aimee coming here to post a happy trip report.
We do find ourselves getting involved when someone from our Scuba-driving fraternity is in an accident or incident. Although the conversations can sometimes get a bit intense, that's because we do care. We care about our fellow divers, and too, we know it could be us - or a buddy - and we want to find out what happened and learn from it if we can. I'm glad you recognized that and weren't offended.
Your blog was linked to in this thread and it's clear from reading it what a wonderful family you are, and that you and your daughter have a supportive community around you.
Again, thank you for making the effort to come here and post.
Blue Sparkle
PS: If you do by any chance find yourself wanting to post here again, please feel welcome to.
Pat, thank you for coming by, and for understanding our discussions. God's Peace and Comfort to you and your daughter.
UnderSeaBumbleBee
Contributor
Pat,
We are so glad you joined us, but wish it were for a happier reason. From all I have read about Aimee, she sounds like a remarkable person that any of us would have been blessed to know.
Give yourself permission to feel how you feel in the moment. That may be laughing and retelling a story or it may be breaking down and sobbing without control. She was and is still part of your life. We respond with emotion to those that matter to us.
My mom's sister passed away when she was 34. Her husband in his attempt to deal with his own suffering would never permit the children to speak of their mom again or to have contact with our family. His response made a terrible situation even harder for the children and himself. It is important to remember and to talk.
I would encourage you to get a video camera and sit down with your daughter and some other family members to record you talking and sharing memories about Aimee. In particular have your daughter share some special memories and fun times. She is so young and will need a bit of help holding on to precious memories of her mom. My brother passed away almost two years ago at the age of 46 and his children have expressed over and over again that they are afraid they will forget him. Your daughter has lots of memories right now that are easy for her to recall.
I would also encourage you to get a journal and jot down memories of Aimee as they come to you over the course of the coming months and years and to save that as a gift for your daughter. Write anything and everything that comes to mind. What color she liked. How she felt about frost, pie, politics, religion and so forth.
I actually encourage all couples, but especially those having problems to get a journal and without telling one another what they write to daily write something positive that they notice about their spouse. It does wonders to how you view someone when you are constantly digging for the good instead of the bad. Then after doing that daily for a year to present the journal to your spouse. Tell them that you love them and you have been taking note about all the things you appreciate in and about them.
Pat, I don't mean to be trite or glib with my reply to you. There really aren't words that anyone can say or a list of tasks anyone can tell you to do to make it all better. You will find what works and doesn't work for you. However we can help you here, we would be glad to do so. (((((hugs))))
Grace & Peace,
Leah
We are so glad you joined us, but wish it were for a happier reason. From all I have read about Aimee, she sounds like a remarkable person that any of us would have been blessed to know.
Give yourself permission to feel how you feel in the moment. That may be laughing and retelling a story or it may be breaking down and sobbing without control. She was and is still part of your life. We respond with emotion to those that matter to us.
My mom's sister passed away when she was 34. Her husband in his attempt to deal with his own suffering would never permit the children to speak of their mom again or to have contact with our family. His response made a terrible situation even harder for the children and himself. It is important to remember and to talk.
I would encourage you to get a video camera and sit down with your daughter and some other family members to record you talking and sharing memories about Aimee. In particular have your daughter share some special memories and fun times. She is so young and will need a bit of help holding on to precious memories of her mom. My brother passed away almost two years ago at the age of 46 and his children have expressed over and over again that they are afraid they will forget him. Your daughter has lots of memories right now that are easy for her to recall.
I would also encourage you to get a journal and jot down memories of Aimee as they come to you over the course of the coming months and years and to save that as a gift for your daughter. Write anything and everything that comes to mind. What color she liked. How she felt about frost, pie, politics, religion and so forth.
I actually encourage all couples, but especially those having problems to get a journal and without telling one another what they write to daily write something positive that they notice about their spouse. It does wonders to how you view someone when you are constantly digging for the good instead of the bad. Then after doing that daily for a year to present the journal to your spouse. Tell them that you love them and you have been taking note about all the things you appreciate in and about them.
Pat, I don't mean to be trite or glib with my reply to you. There really aren't words that anyone can say or a list of tasks anyone can tell you to do to make it all better. You will find what works and doesn't work for you. However we can help you here, we would be glad to do so. (((((hugs))))
Grace & Peace,
Leah
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patmrhoads
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UnderSeaBumbleBee (Leah),
Thanks so much for your post. I didn't find it trite at all. I especially love the idea of having my daughter talk about her mom on camera now. Finding out how to preserve her memory of her mommy is one of the biggest concerns for the longer term. Aimee was a fantastic mom, and our daughter loved her very much. It's important to me to help her remember her mom and how she feels about her now when she gets older.
Thanks so much for your post. I didn't find it trite at all. I especially love the idea of having my daughter talk about her mom on camera now. Finding out how to preserve her memory of her mommy is one of the biggest concerns for the longer term. Aimee was a fantastic mom, and our daughter loved her very much. It's important to me to help her remember her mom and how she feels about her now when she gets older.
UnderSeaBumbleBee
Contributor
Pat, I am glad you a received my post in the spirit in which it was meant even though my words are lacking. I am also glad you are open to the idea of video recording your daughter share her own memories in her own words. Allowing her to tell the story of her mother herself will be of great benefit to her. I would suggest perhaps doing deliberate interviews where you or someone else asks her questions about events and then have her tell you the story about what happened. I would also suggest that perhaps you get a tripod, set it up, turn on the camera and record the two of you just talking about Aimee. If there was a special place they used to go together, go there and have her tell the story about special times while she is in that place.
Someone recommended "A Grace Disguised How The Soul Grows Through Loss" by Jerry Sittser I haven't read enough to give an honest review, but can post one here or in a pm if you want to know more.
Will continue to pray for you and your precious little one.
Someone recommended "A Grace Disguised How The Soul Grows Through Loss" by Jerry Sittser I haven't read enough to give an honest review, but can post one here or in a pm if you want to know more.
Will continue to pray for you and your precious little one.
reefman
Contributor
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