The whole durability thing is in my opinion an internet gag. I've got a TLS350 which is the 2nd lightest/flexible suit on the market(fusion would be first, I'm guessing, but I've never even seen anyone wear it so I can't say). I haven't had a puncture from diving yet, and it's got over 100 dives on it(combined wreck penetration and cave diving.....not just swimming outside wrecks). The kneepads are starting to get that worn-in look, but they've still got years of life left in them.
From my experience, leaks are because of manufacturing defects or accessories, not because you tear a suit. Things like zip-seals, worn seals, worn zippers, worn seams, ect ect ect are reasons for leaks, and all the major suit manufacturers I've seen while diving(Moby's, Viking, DUI, Whites, Poseidon, USIA, Pinnacle, Bare....probably missed one) all seem to be of comparable aging quality. Sometimes they last, sometimes they don't. It's about aggregate reliability, and they all seem to be pretty similar, so I wouldn't stress too much over that or trying to put a number on how rugged suit A is versus suit B.
Concentrate on what features you want. I just picked up a pair of the SiTech "glove lock" dry-glove ring sets(not the older, more well despised pair that you squeeze on) and couldn't be happier with the ring system, not to mention having dry hands REALLY is that great(for me). Yesterday I did 2 155ft dives at 42* for 35 minutes on the bottom with another 30 in deco and my hands didn't even get cold! But maybe you want zip-seals, which means a DUI is your most likely candidate(they might install them on other suits at your request, not sure though). Maybe you like the off-set inflator valve of the Bare suits vs. most. Maybe a cut of one brand fits better than most, and you already mentioned your sizing may be difficult so this is a good area to concentrate on. Rockboots or attached boots....it's all personal preference.
What I'm getting at is that there is not one golden standard. Different suits for different preferences. Go try some out at demo days, or befriend some local divers to let you try their suits for a dive. Depends on where you live with renting them. In New Jersey it's not problem, but I haven't seen drysuits for rent south of NJ.