I think that, with most rec divers having the "traditional primary & octo" set up without long hoses, the assumption would always be traditional secondary donate unless specifically discussed.
If I happen to dive with someone with a long hose set up, I would expect them to fully explain the set up and do a dry run on land and possibly do a drill underwater to demonstrate how the set up works.
See that right there is the joy of primary give or primary take, you are never really caught off guard. You ALWAYS know that YOUR gas is under your chin on a necklace. So if your buddy that you did a pre-dive briefing with follows the briefing to the T, or your buddy flips out and just snatches your reg, or some other stranger in a dive pack snatches your reg, the one thing that never changes is what YOU do. Underwater I am all about preserving ME first and foremost, if I can also save someone else I am all for that too, but I come first. But I always know where my primary donating gas is, its in my mouth. I am not searching for an octo that slipped out of a holder or got twisted behind my back and backplate or wherever it is. My donating gas is very quick to identify by me or to be taken by a mugger, then I just go to my necklace.