I am completely surprised at how Bama hates Auburn like we hate Miami or FSU. There are a ton of pages that are nothing but Auburn jokes. So, here is some more gratuitous Auburn humor for CindyMac:
Day 1 - Per his daily ritual, Satan walks through his domain to see that everyone is sufficiently miserable. As usual, he pauses to take special pleasure in the pain and agony displayed by the new arrivals. However, on this particular day he spots a lanky Auburn Grad smiling and looking like he's at a picnic. "Hey you!" Satan yells, "The temperature in here is a constant 95 degrees and the humidity is 90%! You're supposed to be miserable!" Quips the Auburn Grad, "Maybe so, but it feels just like the Auburn campus in June to me. I had a lot of fun on those hot summer nights at Auburn." Miffed; Satan, decides to adjust the temperature up to 100 degrees and the humidity to 95%.
Day 2 - On his daily stroll, Satan notices everyone appears exceptionally miserable today. He then remembers the smiling Auburn Grad and decides to see how he's faring today. To his surprise, the Auburn Grad has unbuttoned a couple of buttons on his shirt, but he still looks happy and carefree. Satan cries out, "Hey Awbie, what are you smiling at now?" The Auburn Grad replies, "Well this reminds me of those 4th of July parties we used to have at Auburn. Boy those were some great parties." This really irritated Satan, who immediately turned the temperature to 110 and the humidity to 100%.
Day 3 - Satan dispenses with his daily stroll and goes straight to the region of hell where he would locate the Auburn Grad. Sure enough, he finds the Auburn Grad, shirt- off, with a huge grin on his face. "Okay, so what is it this time? Satan asks. "Well, it's just like Auburn in August. Man we had some great times getting ready for school to start, seeing friends again that left for summer break, helping them move back in the dorms in the August heat, and then party till your first class started."
Totally irate, Satan determines to put an end to this charade. He sets the temperature down to zero degrees and whips up 20 mile per hour wind. Later that day, Satan can wait no longer wait and decides to check back on the fool hardy Auburn Grad. He finds him huddled and shivering lips blue, arms folded, snow in his hair and icicles hanging from his mustache. But bigger than an Auburn Grad with a date that is not of the bovine family, there he was laughing out loud and wearing a huge smile. "I GIVE UP!" declared Satan. "What in blue blazes could you find to be happy about now?" The Auburn Grad replied, "Well, this can only mean one thing... The Auburn Tigers have finally won a National Championship!"
