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"about four feet and shy a brick"?

Great guess!!
Actually, in an effort to be polite, I looked over the side of the boat, and said "about 4 or 5 feet."
She seemed to think that I was being a wise guy.....
 
Dumbest thing I've heard ... "I never worry about how much air I use. That's what dive guides are for." I've heard it multiple times, in several variations ... sometimes on trips, sometimes posted right here on ScubaBoard, and once from a so-called cave diver ...

... Bob (Grateful Diver)

LoL Bob! You wouldn't have happened to hear this on our Mexico trip, would you?
 
I'm going to take the [university; lower cost] rescue class so I can keep on diving. It's cheaper instead of renting.

This coming from a rescue diver who plans to buy all his own gear within the next 5 months. Yes, I did type that right.

Not that bad. Part of the reason I took the Advance Open Water class a month or so after my OW is that I got free rentals for a couple of weeks. Those rental prices can be high and intimidating. Not necessarily the best reason, but not stupid.
 
My favourite so far was from a young lady who'd run her air down very low, which ended the group's dive. I watched the DM repeatedly signal to her, asking how much air she had remaining, and she just stared blankly back. Then he swam across, grabbed her spg, checked it then thumbed her up.

Her first question on the surface was "Did I do something wrong?" Genius.

Dove with a guy that when I asked how much air he had left, his reply: The ok sign.
 
Heard on a boat in California. Instructor talking student -in a fairky arrogant "see what a great diver I am" tone - about proper weight after Dive 1...

"I could tell I was over-weighted on that dive because when we descended I crashed into the bottom a lot harder than usual..."


Really? How hard do you USUALLY crash into the bottom?

---------- Post added April 17th, 2013 at 04:41 AM ----------

Dove with a guy that when I asked how much air he had left, his reply: The ok sign.

Unless you were my instructor in a class, on a recreational dive you'd probably get the same response from me for anything less than 1,000 psi. The answer of "ok" when asked "how's your gas" is fairly common all over the world. Did you discuss something different during your pre-dive planning with your buddy? (Did you discuss anything during your pre-dive planning with your buddy?)

If you persisted in asking me "how's your gas" after I said "ok" you'd get a different hand signal altogether.

:d
 
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The best is the students that buy all of their personal gear on Ebay without trying it on. Or someone buying the cheap "snorkel kit" from a thrift store thinking it will work just fine! >.<
 
My favourite so far was from a young lady who'd run her air down very low, which ended the group's dive. I watched the DM repeatedly signal to her, asking how much air she had remaining, and she just stared blankly back. Then he swam across, grabbed her spg, checked it then thumbed her up.

Her first question on the surface was "Did I do something wrong?" Genius.

I think her mother is in our club!!!:confused:
 
The best is the students that buy all of their personal gear on Ebay without trying it on. Or someone buying the cheap "snorkel kit" from a thrift store thinking it will work just fine! >.<

That hurts my feelings (a little) because I bought all my stuff before I'd done any diving BUT I did do a lot of reading and reading and reading and a bit of thinking before putting the money down. As for the snorkel, I got one of the most expensive one though. :D
 
If I have a caridac event, feel free NOT to place the heel of your hand on my scrotum. I dont think it'll do me much good :p

Well, if you're going to die of a heart attack...
 

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