Post Your Pretty Funny Stuff Here
- Thread starter sandshaker
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OP
sandshaker
Contributor
OP
sandshaker
Contributor
quick wit!!!!!!!!!!
A man boarded a plane with 6 kids. After they got
settled in their seats a woman sitting across the
aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, "Are all
of those kids yours?"
He replied, "No. I work for a condom company. These
are customer complaints.
A man boarded a plane with 6 kids. After they got
settled in their seats a woman sitting across the
aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, "Are all
of those kids yours?"
He replied, "No. I work for a condom company. These
are customer complaints.
The Anchor
Contributor
Deefstes
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m3830431
Contributor
probably not the only reason not to go to Mozambique
Deefstes
Contributor
- Messages
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- Reaction score
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What do you mean? I would go to Mozambique tomorrow if I could. The diving there is superb, the general scenery is lovely and the birdwatching opportunities (my other passion) is fantastic. I've been to Mozambique only once but loved every moment of it.
ps - I think you'd be hard pressed to find any lions in Mozambique - not exactly lion country.
The Anchor
Contributor
This will warm your heart. Just when
you have lost faith in human kindness.
Someone who teaches at an Elementary in Thorsby forwarded the following letter. The letter was sent to the principal's office after the school had sponsored a luncheon for the elderly. An old lady received a new radio at the lunch as a prize and was writing to say thank you. This story is a credit to all humankind. Forward to anyone you know who might need a lift today.
Dear Thorsby School:
God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the Sunnybrook Assisted Home for the Aged. My family have all passed away and I am alone so thank you for your kindness to a forgotten old lady. My roommate is 95 and has always had her own radio, but she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was
napping. The other day her radio fell off the nightstand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears.
She asked if she could listen to mine but I told her to piss off.
Thank you for that opportunity.
Sincerely,
Edna.
you have lost faith in human kindness.
Someone who teaches at an Elementary in Thorsby forwarded the following letter. The letter was sent to the principal's office after the school had sponsored a luncheon for the elderly. An old lady received a new radio at the lunch as a prize and was writing to say thank you. This story is a credit to all humankind. Forward to anyone you know who might need a lift today.
Dear Thorsby School:
God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the Sunnybrook Assisted Home for the Aged. My family have all passed away and I am alone so thank you for your kindness to a forgotten old lady. My roommate is 95 and has always had her own radio, but she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was
napping. The other day her radio fell off the nightstand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears.
She asked if she could listen to mine but I told her to piss off.
Thank you for that opportunity.
Sincerely,
Edna.
'Mississippi Blonde'
Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very
attractive blonde woman from Mississippi arrived and bet twenty
thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice.
She said, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I play topless.'
With that, she stripped to the waist; rolled the dice and yelled, 'Come
on, Southern Girl needs new clothes!'
As the dice bounced and came to a stop, she jumped up-and- down and squealed 'YES! YES! I WON! I WON!'
She hugged each of the dealers...and then picked up her winnings, and her clothes and quickly departed.
The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them
asked, 'What did she roll?'
The other answered, 'I don't know... I thought you were
watching.'
Moral of the story:
(1) Not all Southerners are stupid.
(2) Not all blondes are dumb.
(3 ) BUT all men... are men
Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very
attractive blonde woman from Mississippi arrived and bet twenty
thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice.
She said, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I play topless.'
With that, she stripped to the waist; rolled the dice and yelled, 'Come
on, Southern Girl needs new clothes!'
As the dice bounced and came to a stop, she jumped up-and- down and squealed 'YES! YES! I WON! I WON!'
She hugged each of the dealers...and then picked up her winnings, and her clothes and quickly departed.
The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them
asked, 'What did she roll?'
The other answered, 'I don't know... I thought you were
watching.'
Moral of the story:
(1) Not all Southerners are stupid.
(2) Not all blondes are dumb.
(3 ) BUT all men... are men
OP
sandshaker
Contributor
^ppfftttt 
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