New Twist to an Old Joke

Please register or login

Welcome to ScubaBoard, the world's largest scuba diving community. Registration is not required to read the forums, but we encourage you to join. Joining has its benefits and enables you to participate in the discussions.

Benefits of registering include

  • Ability to post and comment on topics and discussions.
  • A Free photo gallery to share your dive photos with the world.
  • You can make this box go away

Joining is quick and easy. Log in or Register now!

GeekDiver

Contributor
Messages
576
Reaction score
1
Location
Houston
# of dives
500 - 999
Dear Technical Support:



Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in the overall performance - particularly in the cooking and cleaning applications, which operated flawlessly under Girlfriend 5.0.

In addition, Wife 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as NFL 9.5 and NBA 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as Decorating 5.0, Shopping 3.0. and Conversation 8.0. Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system and Cooking 1.0 wont run at all. I've tried running Complaint 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail. I’ve thought of reinstalling Girlfriend 5.0 but that would require Divorce 1.1, Child Support 8.2 and Alimony 5.3 and the cost of such applications would be prohibitive besides, I would still prefer to be able to run Wife 1.0

What can I do?


Signed,
Desperate



Dear Desperate:


First keep in mind, Girlfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Wife 1.0 is an Operating System. Try to enter the command: C:\ Sports /Hunting to download Golf 6.2, which should automatically install BBQ 3.0.

If that application works as designed, Wife 1.0 should then automatically run the applications I’m Lonely 2.0 and Get Attention 3.5. which may result in better performance in Housecleaning 2.6 and Cooking 1.0 But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Wife 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Couch 7.0, or Wine 6.1. Wine 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Nagging. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstall another Girlfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Wife 1.0. If you still have not received any added performance in Wife 1.0 try installing Flowers 5.2 or Gifts 4.0. Please understand these programs will also install Debt 7.0 which can over time become unstable.

In summary, Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited processing ability and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve Processing and performance. I personally recommend Fine Dining 3.0 and Romance 7.7.


Good Luck,

Technical Support
 
I've just installed Wife 2.0, much better than Wife 1.0 and not nearly as expensive!=-)

Oh I'm gonna burn for that one!
 
Yeah, just uninstalled Wife 2.0 and am going to go back to Girlfriend 12.0 as soon as I can find one... hehehe...=-)
 
uh huh. Try it buddy and see what happens...

Oh, wife 1.0 is the old version. Luckily, you have wife 2.0, which is much smoother running. It is set to auto-run for cooking 1.5 and is programmed for the occasional cleaning 3.0 along with working 2.2. Your version has an anti-nag 2.0 device pre-installed, which rarely worked on the wife 1.0 version. Generally, the anit-nag 2.0 works flawlessly unless you run too many messy husband 4.2s or ignore wife 6.1’s. Generally, if these programs are running at the same time as the monthly disc clean-up, anti-nag will be disabled and the system could crash.
 
Or \usr\bin\single No Runtime errors with this one...
 
I would suggest to run girlfriend 3.0 in a seperate VM so Girlfriend 2.0 doesn't cause any conflicts.
 
Be aware that running Girlfriend 2.0 and Girlfriend 3.0 on the same system can cause a fatal error. In addition, both systems may erase Boyfriend Beta version if either detects the other.

If this happens, all three systems become unstable and run Rebound 1.0 for an indeterminate amount of time.


Furthermore, running too many instances of Girlfriend x.0 simultaneously may result in a virus. It may, or may not, be possible to remove the virus. Moreover, you may suffer a hard disk crash and be stuck with a floppy drive only.
 
Do it her way!

Mike D
(still married and diving after 27 years)
 
https://www.shearwater.com/products/swift/

Back
Top Bottom