The guys I play golf with asked me which beautiful actress I would like to be stuck in an elevator with.
I told them the one who knows how to fix elevators.
I'm old, tired and I pee a lot.
I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails, followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be over the limit. That's when I did something that I've never done before ... I took a cab home!
Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block, but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident. This was a real relief and surprise because I had never driven a cab before. I don't even know where I got it and now that it's in my garage I don't know what to do with it!!!
During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in a Long-Term Care Home?"
"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No," he said. "A normal person would pull the plug."
"Do you want a bed near the window?"
I told them the one who knows how to fix elevators.
I'm old, tired and I pee a lot.
I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails, followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be over the limit. That's when I did something that I've never done before ... I took a cab home!
Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block, but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident. This was a real relief and surprise because I had never driven a cab before. I don't even know where I got it and now that it's in my garage I don't know what to do with it!!!
During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in a Long-Term Care Home?"
"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No," he said. "A normal person would pull the plug."
"Do you want a bed near the window?"
