Post Your Pretty Funny Stuff Here
- Thread starter sandshaker
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WOODMAN
Contributor
It seems lately that my kleptomania has been getting worse, but if it gets too bad, I just take something for it. 
pidgiepoo
Contributor
>> This pearl of history may have escaped you.
>>
>> History of the Condom
>>
>> I've always been a student of history but I didn't know this.
>>
>> In 1872, a Wyoming rancher invented the condom, using a
>> sheeps's lower intestine.
>>
>>
>> In 1912, a Montana businessman refined the idea by taking the
>> intestine out of the sheep first.
>>
>> Don't thank me, I do this as a public service for the
>> advancement of education.
>>
>> History of the Condom
>>
>> I've always been a student of history but I didn't know this.
>>
>> In 1872, a Wyoming rancher invented the condom, using a
>> sheeps's lower intestine.
>>
>>
>> In 1912, a Montana businessman refined the idea by taking the
>> intestine out of the sheep first.
>>
>> Don't thank me, I do this as a public service for the
>> advancement of education.
inventor
Contributor
OK, I buy my SCUBA gear here in town, like everybody says to on the SCUBA forums. You know, support LDS, buy from LDS. I still don't understand how this helps the Mormons.
pidgiepoo
Contributor
MARRIAGE/MARIJUANA
For those who haven't heard, Washington State just passed both laws - gay marriage and legalized marijuana.
The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalized on the same day makes perfect biblical sense because Leviticus 20:13 says,
"If a man lies with another man they should be stoned."
We just hadn't interpreted it correctly before!
For those who haven't heard, Washington State just passed both laws - gay marriage and legalized marijuana.
The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalized on the same day makes perfect biblical sense because Leviticus 20:13 says,
"If a man lies with another man they should be stoned."
We just hadn't interpreted it correctly before!
pidgiepoo
Contributor
> > A lady walks into a bar and sees a really good-looking guy sitting at
> the bar by himself. She goes over and asks him what he is drinking.
>
> “Magic Beer”, he says.
>
> She thinks he’s a little crazy, so she walks around the bar, but after
> realizing that there is no one else worth talking to, goes back to the
> man sitting at the bar and says, “That isn’t really Magic Beer, is it?”
>
> “Yes, I’ll show you.” He takes a drink of the beer, jumps out the
> window, flies around the building three times and comes back in the
> window.
>
> The lady can’t believe it: “I bet you can’t do that
> again.” He takes another drink of beer, jumps out the window, flies
> around the building three times, and comes back in the window.
>
> She is so amazed that she says she wants a Magic Beer, so the guy says
> to the bartender, “Give her one of what I’m having.” She gets her drink,
> takes a gulp of the beer, jumps out the window, plummets 30 stories,
> breaks every bone in her body, and dies.
>
> The bartender looks up at the guy and says, “You know, Superman, you’re a real
> jerk when you’re drunk.”
> the bar by himself. She goes over and asks him what he is drinking.
>
> “Magic Beer”, he says.
>
> She thinks he’s a little crazy, so she walks around the bar, but after
> realizing that there is no one else worth talking to, goes back to the
> man sitting at the bar and says, “That isn’t really Magic Beer, is it?”
>
> “Yes, I’ll show you.” He takes a drink of the beer, jumps out the
> window, flies around the building three times and comes back in the
> window.
>
> The lady can’t believe it: “I bet you can’t do that
> again.” He takes another drink of beer, jumps out the window, flies
> around the building three times, and comes back in the window.
>
> She is so amazed that she says she wants a Magic Beer, so the guy says
> to the bartender, “Give her one of what I’m having.” She gets her drink,
> takes a gulp of the beer, jumps out the window, plummets 30 stories,
> breaks every bone in her body, and dies.
>
> The bartender looks up at the guy and says, “You know, Superman, you’re a real
> jerk when you’re drunk.”
pidgiepoo
Contributor
Life on a farm..........
>
>
> A little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores.
>
>
> "Not yet," said the little boy
>
>
>
>
>
> His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores.
>
>
> Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
>
>
> "How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.
>
>
> "Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren't getting any milk."
>
>
> Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
>
>
> The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, "You gonna tell him or should I?"
>
>
> A little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores.
>
>
> "Not yet," said the little boy
>
>
>
>
>
> His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores.
>
>
> Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
>
>
> "How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.
>
>
> "Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren't getting any milk."
>
>
> Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
>
>
> The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, "You gonna tell him or should I?"
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