My sausage needs Viagra

[mselenaous]

Whew, glad you weren't referring to your buddy!

I don't wear no stinking sausage... at least not here in SoCal waters. Only when I travel to destinations with strong currents. Haven't a clue as to whether it will inflate and remain "stiff" since I haven't used it in a number of years!

Is this a reference to your personal state of affairs? Or are you still referring your SMB?

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

 

[drbill]

Is this a reference to your personal state of affairs? Or are you still referring your SMB?

Both, of course!

 

[mselenaous]

Problem solved. This HOG sausage doesnt need Viagra.

Sent from my GT-P7310

 

[Quero]

I blow, it becomes turgid and rises, then soon it falls flat lying flacid on the surface
until I blow again. Is my sausage too old to stay erect?



OK I have your attention :shocked2:. Run with it.

To be satisfied with performance, you will need to get yourself a younger sausage. And ask for a demonstration to make sure you are getting a really robust one!

However setting all double entendres aside for a brief moment, on a more serious note, what is the longevity of the average SMB? How often should they be replaced? Although I always have one with me, I rarely need to deploy it
since I'm pulling a float or in a group following a float.

It depends somewhat on the material the SMB is constructed of. I deploy mine on virtually every dive, and the cheapo plastic ones don't last long at all before one of the heat-sealed seams goes. I like the fabric ones, at least until I lose one since they're much more expensive to replace.

 

[Ayisha]

My old sausage had bites in it and I had to replace it. Seriously, I had picked up a shark tooth in Moorea and put it in the same pocket as the sausage - doh. Thought it was a nice reminder. Half the time I put my hand in the pocket, I got "bitten" by the shark tooth and it would be stuck into my hand. Finally pulled out the sausage and looked at it, and it was covered with shark tooth marks. Yep, had to replace the sausage and find a better place for the shark tooth. Upgraded to a bigger, stronger sausage and it's all good.

 

[DivemasterDennis]

Too many people are quick to ignore or not use an older sausage, but a sausage can last a looong time if properly cared for and examined and tested regularly. It is true that a sausage can suffer from lack of use or attention, and then, after a long period of inactivity, may not function properly. Like other equipment, sausages should be examined regularly for irregularities, and if discovered early, a malfunction is correctable by a trained professional. I have had my sausage for as long as I can remember, and it still works just fine. Take proper care of your equipment and it can last indefinitely. Of course, there are those who will sooner or later opt for a newer model, but that doesn't mean the old one is useless. Consider trading it in, or giving it to someone who can still get use from it.
DivemasterDennis (age 59, if you're wondering)

 

[bowlofpetunias]

Whew, glad you weren't referring to your buddy!

I don't wear no stinking sausage... at least not here in SoCal waters. Only when I travel to destinations with strong currents. Haven't a clue as to whether it will inflate and remain "stiff" since I haven't used it in a number of years!

Problem solved. This HOG sausage doesnt need Viagra.

Sent from my GT-P7310

Thanks for pointing this thread out to me mselenaous I read the entire thing and it got me to thinking. :daydreaming: I've slowed down a bit in the last few years so my sausage doesn't get a lot of hard use any more but it still needs care I am more concerned about putting it up wet How do you care for yours? Wipe it off roll it up and tuck it away? How do you dry it off so it doesn't get all mankey and start growing nasty things?

More important perhaps for those of us who don't use ours a lot... how often should we really be taking it out to play with it.. you know.. just to keep our hand in and our skills up?

 

[WarrenZ]

Demoral flexorol and Viagra is a great combination gumby with a stiff one. But if nothing can be done to raise the dead by all means get a sausage that works. Don't need the dreaded zombie sausage getting the best of you.

 

[NAM001]

My thought to the inital post was that if abnormal discharge of anykind persists you should see the doc.

 

[Storker]

IME, with the right technique most sausages can be used successfully, even those that initially seem a bit suboptimal. My sausage, for example, has an opening at the bottom, and the unexperienced user may find it a bit difficult to keep it up. However, if you know how to handle it, it still stands proud every time that's needed.

BTW, can anyone explain to me why this thread made me think of this song?
(Warning: Lyrics may be NSFW in some work environments...)