Is Calling Someone an Ahole and a Jerk Against Tos

[photohikedive]

also, fyi, i was not aware that repeating the same question several times was against TOS. i was simply trying to clarify what the other poster was saying.

It's called trolling and/or harrassment.

this is interesting, because I recently had questions about what constituted harassment under the ToS

so, asking a question more than once is harassment, couldn't the person just put andy on ignore?

I mean, I would understand, if they couldn't ignore andy, but, if they could, and didn't then it would be thier own fault, right?

 

[H2Andy]

well, especially when the guy kept answering me with other things. he never said "i don't want to talk about this any more"

had he done so, i would have said, ok ... in fact, when he asked me not to mention his wife anymore (?) i didnt', even though i had no clue what was going on. Remember that, Pete? did you pay attention at that point? i clearly respected his wishes.

and then he kept talking to me. and he kept answering my question. it's just that he kept answering in a way that didn't make sense to me, and calling me names, and being hostile. and i thought i was doing well by remaining civil and asking my question again to get the information i wanted

i think i only asked four or five times, tops ... that doesn't seem out of line to me, especially given the way he was answering

 

[RonDawg]

Andy,

While there were injustices done (allowing a clearly against-TOS comment to remain longer than it should have), something was finally done about it. The mods could have easily just made the thread disappear, no explanation whatsoever.

But, Pete took the time to clean it up, not easy as there were at least two sub-threads of nothing but insults. I have privately thanked him for his effort, and I'll openly thank him here as well.

While it was way out of line for someone to call you an ahole and a jerk, I would have GLADLY traded that for some of the stuff said about me prior to the thread being "closed for remodeling."

Please, let it go.

 

[H2Andy]

Ron, define the "it"

i am more than thankful to Pete for getting the post cleaned up and returned

that's not my issue any more

Pete made some comments that bothered me (about my own posting) and i am addressing those right now

it has nothign to do with you or with the insults you received. i figure that is for you to bring up if you want to or not at all.

 

[RonDawg]

Andy,

All I'm saying is to give yourself a rest. Don't visit this board for about 6 hours. Have a nice, relaxing dinner before coming back here. Your perspective might be different after you've been away for a while. Mine certainly was.

The thread in question has caused so much grief, for so many people, and emotions are still running high over it even after the offensive material was removed.

I'm not attacking you Andy, all I'm saying is to back off and relax a bit. I'm glad I did just that this morning. It would have ruined the rest of my day if I hadn't.

 

[H2Andy]

thanks, but i dont' think i need to do that

i am fine, feel ok, and am not emotional at all ... not sure why you would think i am

just because you needed to back off this morning doesn't mean i need to as well ... people are different (meaning the level of emotion needed to have to "back off" for a bit varies form person to person .. some have a high threshold, some have a low threshold ... for a variety of reasons, mine is higher than most ... i very very very very seldom get truly emotional)

i appreciate your advise, but ... it just doesn't make sense to me, given how i feel ...

i'm quite alright

(and i do appreciate you tring to give me advice since this morning, but we are different; we're just approaching this thing from very different perspectives and in different ways)

 

[The Chairman]

Apparently my best was not good enough for you. For this I apologise.

In his second response to you he indicated you were pissing him off, and still you continued asking.

However, the policeman who writes a ticket for running a red light that leads to an accident is never questioned why he also wrote a ticket for merely running a red light to another. Citing both does not construe more or less importance to the other, as both were wrong.

As I pointed out, I cleaned the thread without any malice to ANY participant. It appears that I have failed you in this. Again, I apologise for any implications, real or imagined this may give.

 

[adurso]

i'd like a clarification ...

is it ok to call somoeone an Ahole and a jerk?

or is that dependent on who is doing the name calling?

Hello? Is someone calling me? Sorry, thought I heard my name.....

 

[H2Andy]

Apparently my best was not good enough for you. For this I apologise.

In his second response to you he indicated you were pissing him off, and still you continued asking.

pete, there is no need to apologize ... i know you cleaned the thread without malice .. i never said you have failed me on anything .. there is no need to apologize

you said that i was abusive to cdiver. i responded by saying that i was asking him the same question several times because i did not understand his answers

someone telling me that i am pissing them off means, to me, that is their problem and they need to do something about it

someone telling me that they want me to stop talking to them means to me that i need to stop talking to them. which i would have done had he asked me to. he never did. he never said that he no longer wanted to talk.

see the difference?

when he told me to stop talking about his wife, i did, even though i didn't understand

if he had asked me to stop talking to him, i would have stopped.

the only thing i object to is you stating that my four or five times asking the same question in a civil tone is "abuse"

that just doesn't compute with me

my goal is not to get you to apologize, but to communicate with you and reach an undersatnding, even if that understanding is that we disagree on a particular point

 

[The Chairman]

this is interesting, because I recently had questions about what constituted harassment under the ToS

so, asking a question more than once is harassment, couldn't the person just put andy on ignore?

There is no way to quantify harrassment by a number of times a particular question is asked. I also guaged the response to those questions and they were getting more and more upset. There is no need for this.

There is obviously more than one way to harrass someone on a forum such as this. Quite often, the person has no idea they are affecting the other person in such a negative way. They are truly surprised when we discuss their actions with them. As Mark Twain once quipped: "Denial is not just another river in Egypt!"