I think my wife might be leaving me - but now SHE needs to decide....advice???

[ewaiea]

I just lost my husband ten days ago and I am finding myself at somewhat the same crossroads and where do I find myself going back to?...mine (and his) true great love, and that was diving. Sometimes memories are all we are ever left with to help you move on. I'm finding it hard taking my own advice, but there you have it. Perhaps we can heal and help each other. If you're anything like me, you could use a few new friends right now. I'm open to listening, that's all I can offer, but often that is all we need. Good luck. And the reason I'm on this sight is because I am trying to locate any of our students and old dive buddies so I can let them all know of his passing and begin healing and just stumbled onto your post. But I am very sincere in what I had written here for you.

I'm truly sorry for your loss. Losing a spouse must just be unbearable - what I'm going through doesn't even compare. Plus my wife and I (after some calm and matter of fact discussion) have come to terms that it's unfortunate that we're ending the marriage but we don't regret being married for the time we were and are in mutual agreement that it's time to part ways. In the last 9 days since finding this out I've put first and last months rent down on a new 1 bedroom apartment - I've also found a way to give her some financial support in the coming months. I wish her and her daughter the utmost of happiness - I know that they'll find it together.

I appreciate all the well wishes by all of you. Yeah, it seems like a weird thing to be on a dive board discussing this but this is the section of "non-diving related stuff" so I figured what the hell. I don't blog much and if I'm on a forum it's a diving forum so perhaps some of the people are folks whom I've talked with before so there might not be as much sarcasm, insults, etc. And that was the case, and for that I thank you all. One thing about marital advice I've learned, every marriage has it's own unique fingerprint. AND, the only people who know the intricate details to that fingerprint are the husband and wife involved in that relationship. So even though advice is solicited - I still have to trust my judgement above all else - it just so happens that you all are giving me the same great advice that I will be living by.

So in 13 days I'll be hopefully finalized in my uncontested divorce (which we now have the papers) and I can finish off the year with some stability and simplicity in my life. I'm actually excited in a weird sort of way - it's just going to be me, my bird, and my rabbit. We shall take care of one another.

And Chiclet - I know from an online forum this seems not that helpful - but PM me and perhaps we can bounce ideas off of one another from time to time in hopes of seeing each other through such a difficult time - yours especially.

Thanks all and safe diving.

T-minus 10 months and counting to lift off for Palau!