I hope being bested by you does not mean that I've been worsted, since I'm allergic to wool. I reread through the posts, to the extent permitted by my limited attention span, but could find no clear point at which your lunatic competitiveness had been satisfied. The triumphs seem to exist only in your own assertions to that effect. These declarations might have been more convincing if you had been wearing a flight suit and standing on the deck of an aircraft carrier.
I was surprised by the suggestion of literacy evoked by your quote from Paulo Coelho. I'm not sure why it was rendered in French rather than Portugese, but there are so many things beyond the scope of my understanding. I first became aware of Coelho a long time ago; not as a novelist but as a songwriter. He wrote a number of songs for one of my favorite singers, the late Elis Regina. "Tristeza Que Se foi" is one of those things that has stayed with me for decades. I love the way she audibly breathes through her nose. Has she really been gone for so many years? Triste.
CBN, it's a bad idea to skip taking your meds. Follow your doctor's instructions, and perhaps that hypercompetitive fixation will become muted. After all, life is not a contest. Conducting yourself as if it were is strongly indicative of a profound lack of self-esteem.