... so why then did we close two threads on this topic out of consideration for family members who were reading, despite the fact that they were told multiple times that some things would be said that they would find hurtful?
We didn't. The first thread was closed because a few people decided to get into a pissing match and start hurling insults causing a bunch of post deletions.
The second thread was closed because the accident discussion seems to have run its course. Since the topic drifted into more general conversation, it was split off here so as to not muddy that thread with non-related talk. If we start getting new developments, we'll reopen that thread for accident discussion, or add the comments to it to keep the information centralized.