Thanks Everyone once more for such great help and responses- I so appreciate it all.
We will start contacting dive ops tomorrow.. and see what availability they have and perhaps try to plan our trip around that... Tres Pelicanos seems to be popping up in this thread lots- so will start there first.
@Skittl1321 Thank you so much for your sharing- I really appreciate it. I have had some "moments" where I have been a little uncertain (not for any reason at all- just out of the blue), and it helps to know that someone else has too. In any of those cases, a few eye to eye contacts with my husband, and I have been fine. Just knowing the dive master is around somewhat close helps too.. They were never right on top of us- but would be well in sight and would look back to make sure we were around. One did hold my hand the first time I did a bigger swim through with some surges too.. which was wonderful- I think it was my 2nd dive in Hawaii.
And I cannot imagine taking 15 minutes to descend! Ugh- would feel so bad if that was me. it's like I get below 15 feet and I am fine.. its just the first little bit that I can't go down easy..
@sefuchs and
@ggunn Thanks for your comments on the weights.. I agree- I need to learn.. It has been very frustrating to have such bad control up that high.... Maybe I was a little underweighted some times.. and some might be beginners.. For the manta dive I was so overweighted... it was uncomfortable.. but I stayed steady at the bottom for the show

(This overweighting was not with the regular companies we went with during the day)
and thanks for the condo recommendations will check them out.. We are not drinkers, partiers (I am sure we will have some drinks.. but are not there to party). Not into clubbing at all. We are in our early 40's, late 30's- no kids, quiet, want to experience the local vibe, eat some nice food, and relax.. and be in the water lots.. In Hawaii we stay on the Big Island, in the south- Keakeakua Bay.. which is really chill- not too touristy, and NO beaches- just lava rock and snorkelling.. lots of swimming there- every day- We love that part of it.. usually just go north to the beaches (90 minute drive) once during the trip- sometimes after diving too, as its closer.
@MMM - yes I take big belly breaths.. and in the past have had great air time, and bouancy control on the bottom.. Think the yoga helps with the air time.. as I can slowly breathe in and out

Thanks for your thoughts and recommendations.. I may tag you as we get closer with some questions about the ruins.. appreciate the hotel recs too- I will check them out. And thanks for the thoughts on the weights- i will let the DM know for sure.
It's funny- I looked for a pic for my avatar- and 1/2 of my pics are in swim throughs and lava tubey things.. one I am holding hands with my husband.. but for being nervous- I guess I am more comfortable down there than I think sometimes
You all are wonderful! Thank you