Not sure what to say. If you saved a fellow diver you would be called a Hero. Don't know about others, but I can't even comprehand the emotional stress you had to go through saving your wife. The tough alone of a situation like that makes me want to throw up.
The only referance I have is a video I saw about Audreys last dive, and that is no help for me eather. I don't want to start an off topic discussion, but if you are second guessing your self, you might want to look at that video and see (in my opinion) how superior your crisis management was compared to a professional support team.
Once things settle down I would like to know if you think you would be as affective if your EFR course was a few years old? Or do you think things would (god forbid) turn out different. Also I am curious how your primary insurance is handeling this situation, and if your wife has dive insurance, what is their involvement.
Very personal questions, and you don't have to answer unless you want to and feel up to it.
You are a Hero