Corrupt-a-Wish

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Granted, you eat a whole box of All Bran extra fiber and spend 1 hour in the bathroom when all that fiber does its trick.

Wish I had an endless supply of rosé wine.
 
Granted but no one brought any fins or masks.

I wish weekends were 4 days long and week days were only 3 days long
 
Granted, Weekdays are 3 days long, that makes the work week 21 days long, with a 4 day weekend. Thanks pal, we just lost every other weekend, we now only get half our regular days off.

Wish I had an SUV tricked out for diving.
 
Granted, you can now take your Hot Wheels Ford Explorer diving anywhere you want in your BCD's pocket.

Wish I could stop writing stupid corrupt wishes.
 
Granted, you now write illiterate stupid corruptions. (Actually the hot wheels was good)

Wish I stay on at the new job (Start work tomorrow!!!!).
 
Granted, you stay on, but you are informed you have to work twice the hours for half the pay.

I wish they gave you time off from work to dive.
 
Granted, they give you time off from work to dive as much as you want. You're fired.

Wish I could stop biting my nails.
 
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granted, you bit all your nails off and start to bite on your relatives nails

wish, I had some smores
 
Granted, they catch fire, you swing the stick to put it out, it flies onto your tent, starting a fire that destroys all your supplies, hiking boots and clothes. Your sockin' it out of the Pacific Northwest in your skivvies, and eating pine cones.

Wish they had better movies at the library.
 

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