ADVICE for Solo Dive trip STRESS

[dumpsterDiver]

buy a pony bottle.. it is your best innoculation against retarded diver syndrome

 

[rx7diver]

What to do? ... do I not dive??

Tmp,

My then-GF and I were trained by the same old-school, no-nonsense, hard-nosed University instructor (though a couple of years apart). Diving with her was so effortless, so much fun. We dove a lot together.

Then I began advanced diving, which she never did. At first, my advanced dives were with friends who were taking the same tech courses I was taking. But eventually I began doing occasional advanced dives with people I did not personally know.

On one occasion, I was diving with an extremely experienced diver in marginal visibility on a deep-ish Great Lakes wreck (~170 ffw) when I lost her (or she me). She had continued swimming when I paused to stare at something. I looked up and she had disappeared. So ... I just hung out for a few moments, hovering by the rail of that schooner, calmly reviewing contingencies. After a few moments she returned from out of the gloom, quite calm, looking for this then-rookie. We traded okays and continued our dive--without missing a beat.

I have "always" had a mindset for self-reliance, so this incident is noteworthy only because it "proved" to me what I had only imagined until that point: Diving--even advanced diving--with someone you haven't trained with and don't know very well, if at all, need not be stressful at all, and can in fact be extremely fun!

FWIW.

Safe Diving,

rx7diver

 

[Lopez116]

Are your concerns and trepidation more about the pragmatics (safety and finding a competent buddy) or more about the emotional (not having your wife with you because of the relationship)? I don't mean any disrespect by it at all as my wife is also my dive buddy and if she wouldn't go because of relationship-related reasons, I would have my own reservations about going.

It sounds like the diving would be relaxing and therapeutic for you. If this trip is Grand Cayman as your signature leads me to believe, why don't you go and do some mellow shore diving with the shops' DMs?

 

[tmp]

Thanks for all the great advice from everyone. I have read them all and all you you make great points. I have indeed thought about my mental state as it relates to my current situation and no doubt I have no issues nix'ing a diving if in the moment I just dont feel right. I completely get that end of the diving game - you have to be mentally present no doubt.

I think my concerns are definately not having my wife - someone I trust beyond any doubts. But many of you point out that it can still be ok, and in fact great diving with another person.

I have even read the links posted within and they also have great advice I very much appreciate it. I will keep checking back over next few days.

This trip is to Cayman and I have considered just remaining shallow and just mellowing out over the reefs.

Thanks to all of you. TMP

 

[KeithTheSnake]

After reading this thread, I really have no further advice to offer you. I can tell you, though, that I sometimes dive to escape. I've bailed out on dives, though, when I felt edgy. My wife doesn't dive at all, but she commented to me about how I do a lot of cool things and that she feels she's cool vicariously through me. I can only wish you well -- have a good dive.

 

[muzikbiz22]

Lot's of great advice throughout this thread. I will add my brief two cents; Go, relax, enjoy yourself, enjoy the diving there, call the dive if you feel you need to. At the very least, grab a chair on Seven Mile beach and CHILL. Especially at night. Is a great place to sit, watch the lightning out over the horizon and RELAX. Be anxious for nothing, life will work itself out

 

[TSandM]

Well, you could always post here on SB and ask if anyone else is going to Caymans at the same time . . . I've had wonderful experiences connecting with people through this place, and it gives you an extended opportunity to chat with the person and find out if your approaches are compatible. When you get there, you'll feel as though you are meeting a friend, and not trying to cope with a pure instabuddy.

 

[watboy]

I was in a similar situation last year, my GF and usual dive buddy and I had broke up. I really needed a dive trip, it relaxes, energizes and rejuvenates me, but I suddenly found myself paranoid of going as a solo diver on a 12 day liveaboard to a remote part of the world. And scubaboard didn't help, as I just read all too many dive accident posts. And it wasn't just diving alone, it was traveling alone as well that got me worried. But when I finally got in the water... it all went away and I immediately found myself again. My insta buddy was great, we clicked perfectly and never had any problems above or below the water and shared many great experiences (we saw a manta breach!). The rest of the people on the boat were also great company for the trip from the spaniard's who shared their love of bird watching during the SI's and the guy sharing his war stories during his navy years... it was a great trip.

Hello,

I have hesitated to post this but I guess as a last ditch effort in possibly maintaining my sanity I will seek out advice or thoughts.

I have a trip coming up in a few days. I am booked as a solo diver. I normally dive with my wife, we are good divers with a variety of dives and dive conditions and certs, under our belts. I have been on several trips and seen several, shall we say "clowns" on the boats and in the water. I am always thankful that my wife is my buddy. She knows me. I trust her. She dives like I do with respect for the water and conservatively.

That being said - we are having a few "issues" that I believe will be resolved over time and she has "opted out of this trip".

Here is my issue: I thought initially it would not be a problem, I will still go - I need a break from life, work and stress anyways. For me my dives have always been complete serenity....quiet other than sounds of the ocean and bubbles, complete relaxation. As it draws near to be perfectly honest I am scared. Scared to be in the water and diving without my wife. I keep telling myself it will be fine - stick with the DM and the group (these will be led dives - very easy). I fear I will get stuck with a "clown", poor diver or inexperienced as a buddy and it will cause my already existing stress to double or perhaps go into overdrive.

I thought about cancelling completely but I do not think that is the answer.

What to do? Do I talk to a DM, the staff.....do I tell them these things.....do I not dive??