In terms of generally available amenities, I don't think you can compare a 140 foot boat to a land-based resort or hotel. I think they (ExVen) accomplish a lot with the pittance of space that they have to work with. Another consideration is that the space on the liveaboard is all geared around an activity, whereas I'd guess the space in a hotel is geared toward the comfort of your stay, with the expectation that your main activity is elsewhere. It is logical to me that a hotel room would be far superior in terms of overall comfort and convenience of stay, because that's the only thing the hotel is there for, and they have much more space and resources with which to accomplish their mission.
I fear your trip was marred by a combination of bad luck (weather, bent DM), some administrative issue with ExVen (short-scheduling a full boat), and perhaps, unrealistic expectations on your part. Search out some threads on other companies, especially Blackbeard, and then see what you think.