SeaJay
Contributor
ElectricZombie once bubbled...
Wow, that LDS must have thought you were a complete idiot. Did you call them on it?
No, I didn't... I know that sounds crappy, but I just sorta stared at him and waited for him to say something like, "I meant 'three POUND tube.'"
Interestingly, CristoLube, as far as I know, isn't available in a three ounce tube. The tubes are two ounces. Anyone ever seen a three ounce tube?
On the way home, I fantasized about what I shoulda done: I shoulda opened my save-a-dive kit (homemade, of course, so that it's got pertinent stuff in it) and looked through it, muttering something like, "Lesse... Lemme make sure that there's nothing in here that I need to replace... Lesse... O-rings, dive tools, extra SPG, bolt snaps, zip ties... CristoLube that I bought for $20..."
Mocking your customers is a great way to attract business, didn't you learn that in Bizarro World Business School?
I couldn't believe it myself. Here's the killer... He knows that I own two retail stores of my own... So you'd think there'd be some professional courtesy... Or something. You'd think he'd know better.
In fact, we just let someone go because of a really poor attitude... And inappropriate comments to the customer; and hers weren't as offensive as what this guy said to me.
It's incredible the way that local business is done here. This dork's attitude was only a good example.
They might laugh on land, but you will be the one laughing when you see their dive skills. ("Paw sez I don't needz no finns...I just walks on da' bottom!")
"Vertical" is the norm, huge fins are the norm, and 40 pounds on a SeaQuest Black Diamond is the norm. Not that the Black Diamond isn't nice... But the way it's used... And the skills involved (or lack thereof) is completely amazing.
The net result is that I say things to them like, "When's your next trip?" Their response is something like, "We're going to Cozumel in December." Curious, I say something like, "Uhhhh... Isn't the ocean like 4 and a half miles that-a-way?" Their reponse is something like, "Yeah, but it's so unsafe to dive out there."
It's not unsafe... Their skills are unsafe.
One of the instructors at my LDS, when asked about decompression diving, turned white as a ghost... "There's no way I'd do something like that... That's DANGEROUS." He's been diving for more than a decade. "I have no desire to ever overstay my NDL's."
So what? I thought... Would it not make sense to learn it anyway just in case?
...And that's how these guys work. They oooo and ahhh over every day-glow accessory and HUB system on the market, refuse to teach any dive skills whatsoever, and then laugh and decare ME dangerous when I come in with long hoses.
I don't generally dive with these guys... And it's a shame, 'cause I would really like another excuse to go diving. I would really enjoy another dive buddy. But I don't need a liability.
...I remember my feelings the first time I saw MHK and Andrew dive... I remember that eerie hover that they had... That totally composed and still float that said that they knew exactly what they were doing. I remember my reaction... And it was one of, "Holy crap... Look at that... Hey, that looks like fun." Of course, I was pathetically unable to accomplish the position, and I got very frustrated very quickly. It was the first time I'd ever seen a skill that I could not do right out of the box.
My point is that now that I can do that position with ease (and am consequencely learning new skills) I wonder what their reaction would be to me underwater. I wonder if they'd try the positions... And I wonder if it's really tick them off. Maybe that's why they hate DIR guys so much... Maybe that's why they make a fool of me in the middle of the shop or try to rip me off. Maybe that's why they just shake their head when they see a long hose or backplate...
Because I am a reminder to them that their skills are lacking. I believe that no matter how nice-n-friendly I am, deep down inside they're threatened by my very existence... And angry at me for it.
They don't even have to see me dive. I might not have a clue... I might be totally skilless myself... But just the gear configuration alone reminds them that they aren't able to dive the way others dive... Whether they want to or not.
...And it's a real shame... 'Cause I am the friendliest person I know. I really try to be nice to everyone... It's just so tough when I'm offered a $200 tube o' lube.
You know, come to think of it... There was ONE time that I saw the reaction to "that way y'all dive." The other diver was kneeling on a platform at Forty Fathom Grotto... Actually, he was sorta kneeling and holding onto a buoy line... His body was actually on the platform, but sorta "up" and kneeling at like a 45* angle. And I remember hovering in the murk, right off of the platform... I was facing him in standard DIR position (like a skydiver) and just sorta hovering there. Only the tips of my fins occassionally flicked as I sorta "helicoptered" around to look at everyone on the platform.
I remember seeing his face mask glint in the sunlight and as he moved his head a little, I could see his eyes sorta focus on me and just watch... For a long time. He just stared...
After a while, I unfolded my hands and shrugged. "What?" I was saying...
Later, his response was this: "Next time, stay on the platform... Don't get off of it... I don't want you to lose control of your buoyancy all of a sudden."
Later, he told me, "I didn't like you just hovering like that... I didn't feel like I had control over you."
Well said.
He and I were dive buddies that day. I was not his student... He was not SUPPOSED to be "in control of me." What in the world makes you feel like I have to be babysat? ...Or is that the "norm" for you?
It was that exact dive that he ran out of air and I had to donate. Y'all know the story. Good thing he wasn't "in control of me," eh? I didn't donate perfectly, but it went without a hitch.
My skills for donating have improved considerably since that dive.
You'd think that they'd figure it out...
This is insane...you have to drive to Florida to find a decent LDS...
Heck, I'm lucky in that regard. All I have to do is drive five hours to Ginnie and I've got EE.
Many people don't have that opportunity.
Of course, the flip side is that yes, this is insane. Think about how many people have never actually seen a good dive shop...
Cool. It would be great to have a chain of dive stores like that.
LDSs' must be extremely arrogant to think that people are going to keep putting up with such nonsense. There are other choices and I will buy my own compressor and mixing gear if needed.
Ditto that!
You know, there was a time not long ago when that was nearly the sole purpose of a dive club... So that they could combine their resources and purchase a compressor.
I can see doing that today... With the right mindset, it'd work just fine.