Outliving your buddies

[TSandM]

My father-in-law is 95, and I have thought a number of times about what it would be like to outlive your friends and even your children. I'm not quite old enough to have that begin to happen to me . . . but I'm "outliving" my dive buddies.

I got certified seven years ago, and not too long afterwards, picked up two regular buddies. One rarely dives any more, and the other mostly teaches. I met a bunch of great people down in Monterey, and most of them aren't diving any more, either. I hooked up with some fantastic friends in Southern California, and still have one solid buddy I can visit and dive with there.

I've made some new friends locally, but I miss all the folks I used to know.

Anybody else dived long enough to go through this? It's rather disconcerting.

 

[AfterDark]

I stopped counting lost dive buddies years ago. It's what lead me to mostly solo diving. Seems like shortly after everything clicks with a buddy something happens and they aren't diving anymore. I am surely the last man standing (still diving) out of all the people I dived with during the 70's and 80's there may be a few still diving from the 90's. Some of us love diving others like and enjoy it for awhile then move on to some other sport. I'm not done being amazed yet! There are still a few dive buddies out there for me to meet yet. I'm working on my last dive buddy now, my wife. She'll be taking OW next month, we'll grow old making shallow dives during the summer!

 

[dumpsterDiver]

My father-in-law is 95, and I have thought a number of times about what it would be like to outlive your friends and even your children. I'm not quite old enough to have that begin to happen to me . . . but I'm "outliving" my dive buddies.

I got certified seven years ago, and not too long afterwards, picked up two regular buddies. One rarely dives any more, and the other mostly teaches. I met a bunch of great people down in Monterey, and most of them aren't diving any more, either. I hooked up with some fantastic friends in Southern California, and still have one solid buddy I can visit and dive with there.

I've made some new friends locally, but I miss all the folks I used to know.

Anybody else dived long enough to go through this? It's rather disconcerting.

Considering that I am coming up on being certified for 40 years now, yeah I know what you are talking about.

We did a trip a few years ago where we scattered the ashes of one of our former buddies over some of his favorite reefs..100 miles offshore.

 

[tstormdiver]

Lynn, I started diving roughly the same time you did (was it that long ago?!?:shocked2. Only 1 or 2 of my original buddies still dives & not with much frequency.Over the years I have been enlarging my circle of buddies, as most fade off after a couple of years. Teaching OW as helped me to keep some buddies,... that, along with getting involved with the local dive scene. Now it seems I am doing the same thing with my circle of cave diving buddies. I am, however, much more cautious with whom I dive when in that arena. Even most of the people who helped to get me started in cave diving have faded away. I must say, I am dreading the day(s) when I may (literally) outlive my cave diving buddies. Unfortunately, a reality in that sport. I agree 100% with Afterdark in his statement about the priority of diving to other people. Sometimes it is a loss of interest, sometimes the gain of a new interest (I quit the martial arts to dive), sometimes life events just get in the way. Be blessed with the buddies you do have & keep growing your circle (at least you sort of have a built- in buddy ). We all have things we can offer to each other!:blinking:

 

[Diver0001]

I'm in my 27th year. I've seen many come and go but what remains are the memories of good times and friendship. Fortunately I never lack good people to dive with.

R..

 

[Randy g]

25yrs of diving for me and like most other sports I have participated in whether it be professional motorcycle racing, rock climbing, spelunking, or sky diving , ect, some keep the fire burning while others let it die out. Most start out pumped up and and gung ho, then after a year or two they fade away and onto a new "thing".

 

[MXGratefulDiver]

I've figuratively "outlived" many dive buddies ... some who decided to start a family, which is a drain on both time and money ... many who just decided after a while that they'd satisfied whatever "itch" got them into diving and went on to other recreational activities ... some who (like a prominent diver we both know) had to stop diving for health reasons. Of the six people in my original OW class, I'm the only one who still dives ... in fact, besides myself, only one of them kept at it for more than about a year.

My solution is to "grow your own" ... I'm diving with four different dive buddies this week-end ... three of them are former students.

... Bob (Grateful Diver)

 

[KeithG]

23 years of diving and I still have the same dive buddy (and she still has 13 more dives than me, but who's counting?). So I am okay there.

I have seen this on my hockey team. We have played together for more than 30 years and are now down to only a handful of "originals". Mostly knee injuries. Some moved away. Some just got too busy with other things in life. No one has actually died yet. So Every couple of years we have to recruit a new skater. It has been hard to maintain the same attitude as new members join the team. We actually have a couple of sons of former players. That is a ilittle weird.

 

[lanta]

I'm not done being amazed yet!

May we be amazed forever.

 

[BabyDuck]

thank goodness i'm in love with my main buddy.

but, yeah, i know exactly what you mean. i had a pretty tight group of local divers who were very into cave diving. one moved back to florida (where he's still very into cave diving), one got very into mountain biking (which he started to stay fit for diving), and one went all wreck/breather on me. then the website we had used to enthusiastically debate diving minutia has sorta shrunk back, and i miss them.

but that's the nature of groups like that. they grow & are really fun & get too big to sustain & 'die'. i've seen enough cycles of groups to know what's coming, though it doesn't make me like it any more.