Ladies, I need your help.

[pennypue]

I guess I'll get someone to drop him off in Anchorage and I can fly to Oahu to pick him up.....I know people that wouldn't do that much for there kids, sadly enough.

Wow, count me in too. You not only have a dog you treat well, but you're a firefighter too?? This girl is NUTS. If she knows how you feel and does not tell you how she feels then you need to look elsewhere. Once she realizes that she no longer has Mr. Wonderful waiting in the wings for her, she may just wake up and come after you. And if she doesn't, she's not the right girl for you. (been there, done this, from BOTH sides)
:07: Now just maybe I'M the right girl? :11ztongue

 

[BluOrchid2]

Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry this is turning out this way. I was reading this thread happily along, all the wonderful gift ideas, and then WHAM! She is seeing someone else. So sorry.

Don't mind me, I love a good romance story.

 

[Seawitch2]

Wildcard,

So sorry it did not work out. You sound like a very thoughtful and sensitive guy.

Here's how I see it:

1- You have let her know about your feelings, therefore, she knew that your gifts (plane ticket, scuba lessons), were more than a Thank You for bringing the dog.

2- Meanwhile, she is dating someone else. You don't get a boyfriend overnight. She must have been seeing this guy while you were giving out the credit card number. Still, she allow you to carry on with the plans for her.

3- THEN, she tells you about the boyfriend, and to add insult to injury, adds that he has lied to her, etc. But, hey, she is still willing to come over and get the goodies.

WC, she is not only not interested, but her actions were cruel and manipulative. Everything happens for a reason, and I think you got the better end of the deal on this one.

My 2psi...

 

[ZenSquirrel]

I learned long ago that ANY power tool is not a good idea. "Hey Baby, got you a suprise! A new chainsaw!" Smack!!

Don't overlook the value of a new chainsaw....if somebody gave me a chainsaw as a present....but then again, I'm a guy.

Hmmm....if things with plugs are out, then your only option is pneumatic tools! Who wouldn't be thrilled with a pneumatic socket driver?

EDIT:

I just got further down the thread. That's a bummer, but if you have already bought the tools, I'd be happy to buy them off your (for cheap).

 

[Raven C]

Dearest Wildcard,

Cancel this trip with the girl and use the money to fly your dog home. Take your dog on a sunset stroll on the beach and go on a great dive yourself. I know it's not as romantic as you had hoped but you might meet someone on your stroll to dive with. Besides, this girl sounds like she's using you. I hope your feelings aren't hurt by my saying so and I hope she didn't break your heart.

Remember your dog won't make you feel remorse or regret for spending your money on him.

And, I think power tools are great. I've used my chainsaw a few times while the neighbors just watch all big eyed. Hahahaha (I could use a new drill. -- she thinks to herself.)

BTW, need I remind you that Wendy said she'll come to Oahu....

 

[H2Andy]

wildcard, you need to be honest here.

do you want to still fly this girl to you and pay for her diving lessons now that
she can not return your romantic interest?

be honest here

if, as a friend, you can do these things and be ok with it, then go through with it.
just be aware that you can't expect anything but friendship back. also, you can't
blame her for anything. she's told you she has a boyfriend, and it's up to you to make
the next move: either cancel everything, or go forward as a friend.

if, however, you can't, you should tell her that you really wanted at least the possibility of romantic involvement, and that you are backing out. that is your perrogative.

i sort of agree with RavenC, though i wouldn't say she's using you. i think she is
certainly interested in flying out there and learning to dive, she just wants you to
know that she's not interested romantically.

ok... let's re-group:

you have no control over what other people do. you can only control your own
actions.

what do you want to do?

 

[scuba_chick55]

That is the worst thing I've ever heard, if a complete and total stranger bought me AOW scuba lessons, was paying for me to go to Hawaii and give me food, I might be crazy enough to do it. Well maybe not but you get the pic. I would dump her like a sack of potatos, I know it's easier said then done but it needs to be done, she's using you.

 

[Wildcard]

I sent her an email last night telling her that I had a problem paying the way of someone elses girlfriend. I asked her to call me today to talk about all this. No call, no email. Guess I got out of this one cheap. I think I'll fly home next month and bring Cody back with me then.
Why are people like this? :-(


Here is a pic of Cody from July when I was home last. The girl is an ex that stoped by to say hi.

 

[FredT]

Some geat ideas! Safety sausage, LMAO. I wouldn't want to give her any "false hopes" though. I like the framed pic idea. I think I will expand it to a small photo album of her going through the class and a couple of dives after...

I learned long ago that ANY power tool is not a good idea. "Hey Baby, got you a suprise! A new chainsaw!" Smack!!

Im still wide open to any other great suggestions. Thanks all for your help!

Actually one of the best recieved presents I've ever given was a chainsaw, with strict instructons to keep her husbands hands off it! She loved it.

GOT to know the lady though....

 

[the_cat_keeper]

Hi, Wildcard,

H2Andy has made some good points... and she should have told you earlier. Well, at least she did not lie or tell you after she flown to see you, did the course, etc.

I have guy friends whom I like but do not want to be involved with romantically. Sometimes they drop hints but I'd pretend not to understand and then drop some hints back... just to avoid embarrassing each other. The last guy was so "insensitive" that in the end I had to write an email to tell him to stay away blatantly. We try to maintain the friendship but things are really awkward now... .

I am telling you this because sometimes the hints we drop are lost on others... and she may have been trying to tell you? Depending on the type of person she is, she may have thought that the flight and the course were because you were thankful to her for babysitting/ escorting Cody. Could it be possible that she is truly disappointed in how the friendship is turning out, that the trip gets cancelled because she is seeing someone else? I would be... if I thought my friend was nice to me as I helped him with his dog but now I suddenly realise that it wasn't the friendship.

Just my 2cents worth... you may argue that the gifts were extravagant but again, it depends on the type of person she is...

Good luck... I was told that there is someone special out there for everyone of us.