imaginary scuba gear

[MrMrEZG]

ok here is the deal. The dive shop that I work for has two stores and we are constantly delivering prank calls to the other store, to ask for "imaginary gear". lately however we have run out of ideas and i need some help

here is some of the stuff that we have asked for:

hoseless regulators (yes she fell for it)

flavored nitrox

cave snorkels

batteries for a power inflater

"FB111" the orthepeadic inserts for the oceanic V-Drive fin

the "MACH 389" cruise control for a DPV (a rubber band)

these are all that i can think of right now (it's late). are there any that you guys know of send me a little bit of laughter.

 

[Fishkiller]

is my computer brand X is giving me the ID ten T error

 

[syruss32]

Do you have then new Mobbys zipper/velcro free drysuit yet?

How much do you charge for 2 4500psi tanks for a weekend?

 

[wetman]

electric dive knife

pre-dive deco gas

water cooled drysuit (which apparently are all too common)

 

[Lost Yooper]

Underwater GPS?

 

[BillP]

Regulator exhaust T muffler (for an u/w photographer)?

There really is such a thing so it doesn't meet your requirement for "imaginary", but they won't know that.

 

[large_diver]

New "heads up" display mask, with gas pressure, depth and compass heading displayed on the inside of your mask without having to look away

New water-oxygen distiller -- gives you an unlimited supply a back-up gas (oxygen) for use in shallow water (ox tox concerns in deeper water). Device can be attached to a first stage and takes H20 and filters out the hydrogen and produces O2 molecules using a newly developed chemical process, leaving you with pure oxygen.

 

[TexasMike]

Waterproof extension cord for my dive light?

an Elemenoh Tank valve? (Since there is H, J, and K, the next one has to be "L-M-N-O", right?)

300 feet of shore line?

 

[TexasMike]

Originally posted by large_diver
New "heads up" display mask, with gas pressure, depth and compass heading displayed on the inside of your mask without having to look away

Actually, I think the folks that make the Cochran computers are working on this (so I overheard at a demo by a cochran rep)

 

[joewr]

What the world needs now:

Glassless mask

Peppermint, strawberry, and chocolate flavored mouthpieces

Electrically heated wetsuit

Auto-reversing fins for swimming backwards

Snorkle extension to use on safety stops

Inflatable lead wt for when you are underweighted

Keeper cord for wts so you won't lose them on an emergency ascent

Joewr...electrically heated wet suit...hmm....