How girls can avoid being hit on?
- Thread starter miss_scuba
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I agree with DCBC (gasp!). I have found a great solution for getting hit on anywhere is simply to get old. There are downsides, though . . .
JohnB47
Contributor
Ok, here is my theory. Men participating in a group activity, such as aboard a dive boat, tend to joke with each other in a way that might not be appropriate in mixed company. When women join the group, the guys try to tone it down a bit, but the resulting "clean" conversation may sound like a proposition.
Example:
(1) In a group of guys, one of them might say, "That blonde on the beach is really hot! I really love those double 80's of hers! hehehe"
(2) In mixed company, he might say: "Hi, beautiful! Do you dive here often?" and the woman might think he is hitting on her.
Seriously, a little light flirting is not a crime. Most women that I know enjoy it, as long as it is just fun and not demeaning. If a woman does not want to deal with it at all, she should probably avoid diving with men (or participating in any other activity that involving men). If you are rude to the guys you are diving with, they probably won't hit on you - but they probably won't want to be your buddy either!
The question is, just what did miss_scuba's friend call "hitting on?" If it was out of line, that is one thing. If it was just a guy trying to be friendly, and she is overly sensitive, that is quite another. If she doesn't like to be around guys, she should find some female diving buddies. If she likes guys, but she has a husband or boyfriend, then she should be pleasant to the guys but let them know that she is married or whatever. That will probably keep them from getting too obnoxious. If one of them continues to harass her, then ask the DM or Captain for help.
Example:
(1) In a group of guys, one of them might say, "That blonde on the beach is really hot! I really love those double 80's of hers! hehehe"
(2) In mixed company, he might say: "Hi, beautiful! Do you dive here often?" and the woman might think he is hitting on her.
Seriously, a little light flirting is not a crime. Most women that I know enjoy it, as long as it is just fun and not demeaning. If a woman does not want to deal with it at all, she should probably avoid diving with men (or participating in any other activity that involving men). If you are rude to the guys you are diving with, they probably won't hit on you - but they probably won't want to be your buddy either!
The question is, just what did miss_scuba's friend call "hitting on?" If it was out of line, that is one thing. If it was just a guy trying to be friendly, and she is overly sensitive, that is quite another. If she doesn't like to be around guys, she should find some female diving buddies. If she likes guys, but she has a husband or boyfriend, then she should be pleasant to the guys but let them know that she is married or whatever. That will probably keep them from getting too obnoxious. If one of them continues to harass her, then ask the DM or Captain for help.
JohnB47
Contributor
Ayisha
Contributor
bold added
Why does your theory involve the assumption that women are *joining* a group of male divers rather than simply being in mixed company on the boat?
Your second example sure sounds like a come-on... The first example sounds like objectification from a distance without approaching the target. The second example sounds like a direct approach fuelled by some over-confidence and group camaraderie. I'm sure you could come up with better examples to support your theory than those!!
shoturtle
Contributor
Do you all realized this thread is 2 years old?
JohnB47
Contributor
airbornediver1
Registered
If there a six or seven guys diving, and a woman *joins* them, guess what; you just *joined* a group a male divers. Why do you have to get so feminist over it? If I go to work at a circus...I just *joined* a circus. Geesh.
airbornediver1
Registered
Johns first example is objectification (great word by the way) and his second example is a come-on. My gosh, is there any winning? This is exactly why guys act different around women. There is always some feminist grading every word that comes out of our mouth or critiquing every action that we do. And people wonder where all the stress between men and women come from.
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