Favorite Military Sayings

[Crawdad]

The Chain of Command

The General:
Faster than a speeding bullet,
More powerful than a locomotive,
Leaps over tall buildings with a single bound,
Walks on water, and
Talks with God


The Colonel:
Just as fast as a speeding bullet,
More powerful than a switch engine,
Leaps over small buildings with a single bound,
Walks on water when it's calm, and
Talks with God on special occasions


The Lt Col:
Faster than a speeding BB,
Loses a tug-of-war with a switch engine,
Leaps over small buildings with a running start,
Swims well, and
Listens at a distance to the voice of God.


The Major:
Can load a gun properly,
Plays with train sets,
Leaps over Quonset huts with a running start,
Can do the Dog Paddle, and
Sometimes pays attention to what the Lt. Col. says,


The Captain:
Is not issued ammunition for fear of self-inflicted injury,
Recognizes a locomotive two out of three times,
Runs into buildings,
Can wade through water less than four feet deep, and
Pays no attention to what the Major says.


The Lieutenant:
Wets himself with a water pistol,
Says "Look at the Choo Choo,"
Trips over steps when entering buildings,and
Doesn't even notice when the Captain says something.


The NCO:
Catches bullets in his teeth and spits them out,
Kicks trains off the tracks,
Picks up buildings and walks underneath, and
Freezes water with a single glance,
He is GOD!

 

[lonerider00]

Our new guys used to run around the boat (I was a submariner) looking for Relative Bearing grease, and water slugs ( a water slug is when you test your torpedo tubes and fire the tube empty, forcing what water was in the tube out).
A saying we had on our boat was " Loose lips may sink ships, but no one hears us coming til it's too late"
C-Dawg

dont forget telling the nubs (non-usefull bodies, or nonquals) to go get some bread from the galley and go aft to feed the shaft seals :11:

 

[lonerider00]

if you had t*ts on your back i'd marry you.

 

[lonerider00]

they'd tease us submariners that 150 men go down 75 couples come up, i'd say "get it right 150 men go down 70 couples come up and 10 are into that group thing... guess which i was...":05: :Kissy: :thinkingo :yourkiddi

the us submarine force: the only orginization in the world where homosexuality is ABSOLUTELY NOT TOLERATED... but, everybody acts like they are!! (havent met a submariner yet that can't say "ok thweetie!!" lol

 

[Fish_Whisperer]

I was preparing to go out on a medevac and went to grab the portable oxygen cylinder. I checked it and found it was empty. Apparently, one of my junior medics had come in with a hellacious hangover and had gone into the dark, cool equipment room and huffed all of the oxygen. I came out of there screaming, "WHO'S THE S***TBIRD WHO HUFFED ALL OF MY ********ING OH-TWO?!! FRONT AND CENTER, YOU ********ING MAGGOT!!" PFC Eason came trotting up. "EASON!!!! DID YOU GO BACK THERE AND HUFF ALL OF MY OH-TWO?!" He admitted that he had. I continued, (loud enough so that everyone in Flight Ops heard it, "THEN I SUGGEST YOU HOP YOUR GOAT-SMELLIN' AZZ UP ON THIS DESK, SQUAT DOWN, AND S**T ME A FULL TANK OF AIR, RIGHT THE *******K NOW!!!!"

And it only got worse from there. I thought the little bastage was going to pass out... LOL!

 

[Dave Zimmerly]

"If the Marine Corps wanted you to have a wife, they would have issued you one."

 

[wstein]

The radio systems we used to use were PRC-77's commonly called "prick-77's", so we used to the the new guys to the company gunny (which is a E-7) to request a prick-e7. It was always funny watching the new guy hit and roll get up and rush across a very large field.

 

[Fish_Whisperer]

The radio systems we used to use were PRC-77's commonly called "prick-77's", so we used to the the new guys to the company gunny (which is a E-7) to request a prick-e7. It was always funny watching the new guy hit and roll get up and rush across a very large field.

LMAO!! Now THAT'S funny! :evil:

 

[lonerider00]

I've got more time j%^kin off on the s#$*er at test depth than you have in the whole f*&^in NAVY!!!!!!!!!!

 

[The Kraken]

"CLEAR ! ! ! . . . . . Comin' HOT !!!