Experienced diver with newly certified spouse

[AdivingBel]

Oh, ok. I guess I was thinking that if a boat had a new diver on it, they might stay away from all the walls. But I guess if he is uncomfortable with doing a wall dive, he could just skip the 1st dive and do the 2nd one.

If he's concerned about fitting in with the group, you might hire a private DM for the first couple of dives (they aren't that pricey and it would give you an extra set of eyes with your newish diver). Then you could tailor your dive from the rest of the group. Maybe skip some swim-throughs or hang along the top of the walls until he gets his "bearings," then proceed from there. It would also take the pressure off from conforming to the rest of the group or holding them back if he goes through his air a bit quickly. That was one of my wife's biggest concerns her first time group, drift diving in Coz. We actually worked out sharing air (balancing our tanks) which relieved a lot of her anxiety and allowed her to really enjoy the dives. Once she relaxed, her air consumption really improved. Your husband is lucky to have you as an experienced diver invested in his enjoyment of the sport as he gets his "sea legs." Have fun.

 

[boulderjohn]

Oh, ok. I guess I was thinking that if a boat had a new diver on it, they might stay away from all the walls. But I guess if he is uncomfortable with doing a wall dive, he could just skip the 1st dive and do the 2nd one.

Having a newer diver in a group can have a profound impact on a Cozumel dive. I have been on several dives in Cozumel where we were expecting to be pretty deep with great swim throughs, only to discover that one of the divers was not ready for such a dive plan, and we ended up doing nothing like what we had thought would happen. About a decade ago I had two consecutive days on the same great dive site (Palancar Caves) with the same DM, but we did two entirely different dives because of the evident ability level of one of the divers in the group the second day. The DMs watch the groups early on and then adjust the planned dive accordingly.

Dave's suggestion for Aldora is a good one. You can do separate dives on separate boats, meet during the surface interval, and then do the second dive together.

This should not last long. If your husband really works on developing buoyancy and trim, he should be ready to join you on all dives in surprisingly little time.

 

[sharky60]

What I was suggesting was only that the first dive be separate, then together on the second dive, with a log beach surface together before.

Dave Dillehay
Aldora Divers

great idea Dave!! ... told you this was a great op!!

 

[jmb122mp]

I'd add Columbia Deep to the list with Punta Sur and Maricaibo... easy to want to go 80-100+ at that site.

If you go with a dive shop like Aldora (not criticizing Aldora, I'm a fan of Aldora), the hubby will likely want/need Nitrox certification given their larger tanks (HP120's and HP100's). Was just in Cozumel diving with Aldora last month. Girlfriend joined our group and the first two days did her check-out dives to complete her OW. I dove with her so I know first hand that she was hitting her NDL on the 2nd dive on the 2nd day and close enough to communicate NDL info to me on the 2nd dive on the 1st day. She (of course) was diving air. She did her Nitrox certification the next day with no NDL issues the rest of the week with Nitrox.

For reference, day 1 : 65 ft for 73 mins and 59 ft for 74 mins, day 2 : 59 ft for 62 mins and 66 ft for 51 mins.

 

[Lorenzoid]

Aldora could be your perfect choice. Since we do our first dives in deeper waters for advanced divers, all 8 of our boats reunite at the beach for a long surface interval at about 10 am. It is common for us to switch divers from the advanced boat to their friends for the second shallow dive. Being small groups of 6 or less in much larger boats it is not much of a problem to add one more for the second dive.

Dave Dillehay
Aldora Divers

That's really brilliant. On one of our early Coz trips some friends of ours, a recently certified couple, joined us. We used an op other than Aldora, and while we usually had the boat just to the four of us, we felt like some of our dives were compromises. Joining up with them for the second dive would have been perfect.

 

[Brules]

Forget splitting up. That is a truely silly idea.

Go with an op that doesn't pull long deep dives with steel 120's like Aldora etc that tend to do more serious diving (Blue XT Sea, Tres Pelicanos, Dive With Martin etc) and dive together!

I use Blue XT Sea and regularly have kids diving with us or brand new divers getting certified (with their own DM's) and we do all the regular dives and have a great time.

The walls in Cozumel are not vertical until you get deeper than you will go, they all slope (Santa Rosa is a sloped wall), so no need to fear your hubby with 12 dives won't cant go anywhere you will. With the Op I use, we stay above 90', do a long hour + surface int and then a shallower dive. As I mentioned before we hit every site but the 4 I mentioned. Do something like that with an op like that and you all can enjoy your ENTIRE dive vacation together.......not apart.

 

[drrich2]

I've been diving in South FL for 10 years, have about 275 logged dives, many of them deep and/or solo as a photographer. My husband is just now getting certified, and will probably have about 12 dives or so under his belt by the time we are headed to Coz in July.

I am happy to spend the first couple of days diving novice-appropriate sites with him, but I would also like to spend a couple days doing more advanced sites too (walls and points south).

Threads like this really bring out people's different values/experiences. Some people are very 'companionate' - big on doing lot of things together. I've even seen posts from people who'll hardly dive without each other. Some are less so, and comfortable pursuing separate interests, or separate 'tracks' within an interest. An example would be an avid diver married to a casual recreational diver; the avid diver may dive local cold water, lower viz. and the spouse only in 'tropical aquarium conditions' on vacation.

My point is, whether you should do all your dives together, or whether it's okay to head out on the advanced boat and leave him doing more benign dives on another, boils down you, him and the two of you. What does it 'mean' to each of you. That's very personal.

Richard.

P.S.:

I ride a bike. I'm strong fast and ride long rides. My wife is slower and I don't like to ride with her because it "ruins" my ride. For years I let that be the dynamic, never realizing the subtle message that I was sending and how it lingered into other parts of our relationship.

So how'd that end? Did she ever 'catch up' in ability and preference? If not, did you give up ever doing the rides you love, or did you move into a pattern of doing some rides with her (her way) & some without (your way)?

 

[RayfromTX]

Threads like this really bring out people's different values/experiences. Some people are very 'companionate' - big on doing lot of things together. I've even seen posts from people who'll hardly dive without each other. Some are less so, and comfortable pursuing separate interests, or separate 'tracks' within an interest. An example would be an avid diver married to a casual recreational diver; the avid diver may dive local cold water, lower viz. and the spouse only in 'tropical aquarium conditions' on vacation.

My point is, whether you should do all your dives together, or whether it's okay to head out on the advanced boat and leave him doing more benign dives on another, boils down you, him and the two of you. What does it 'mean' to each of you. That's very personal.

Richard.

P.S.:


So how'd that end? Did she ever 'catch up' in ability and preference? If not, did you give up ever doing the rides you love, or did you move into a pattern of doing some rides with her (her way) & some without (your way)?

I agree that each person and couple are different. That's why I can only share my experience in case it has a ring of familiarity. In the case of riding? My wife doesn't ride anymore. So there's that.

I won't get into dives that she's not interested and leave her at home while I go do my thing. I'm at an age where having that thing where we are on a similar path is worth it. We have everything else in our lives where we pursue things that we don't share. Diving and politics are our two biggest shared activities. If she never decides to go in a deep cave, then I won't be going there either but if she changes her mind, count me in with a grin.

 

[Charred]

What if you split up, your SO has a bad experience and that's it he doesn't want to dive anymore?

I say dive with him, mentor him, increase his comfort level and get him more quickly up to your level so you can dive together and this problem simply goes away. I bet by the end of the trip he will have vastly improved and you can pick a more adventurous dive.

 

[scubadada]

I am a reasonably experienced diver in a diverse array of environments. I would always trade a more advanced dive or a longer bottom time to dive with my wife. There is nothing I would rather do than dive with my best buddy, I just wish there were more opportunities.