use Rochester wide bands of the proper size and cut the about half of the "attachment" end off the cath so it does not kink.
This is very well-received advice for the Rochesters, but I've found that it doesn't work very well for me. The issue is, the "sealing surface" on the union(?) is greatest about an inch back from the end, such that cutting down the cath tip too much may not leave enough area to properly seal against the union...thus leaks. In my experience, it's always the design of the one-way valve or suit-side bolt that is the greatest limit to smooth flow.
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I do not have a pee valve and have been very uncomfortable. so much so that I have been diving wetsuit instead, and the drysuit stays in the closet.
My current dry suit does not have one and I have been surviving. I have about 30 dives on it. There have been a few times I wish I would have had a valve.
Search the forums enough and you'll definitely find a good list of pros and cons to pee-valves, but I honestly think this is a case where the alternatives are not equivalent.
The hassle and concern over dealing with the catheter is absolutely, unquestionably dwarfed by the benefit of having the pee-valve. It really changes the way you dive (especially if it prompts you to switch from wet to dry).
The UTI issue is not to be dismissed, but it's also not common; big impact, low probability. You just need to be very diligent in cleaning the valve post-dive (I use isopropyl and let it sit 5 minutes before flushing with water, others just flush with a strong stream of water, but an important point seems to be to make sure the valve is dry for storage).