Dear Dork Divers Advice Column – Ask us your questions

[C Chris]

Dear trucker girl -

Diving without a snorkle will not cause you loss of status or result in imminent doom. However, what does concern me are some safety issues brought about by the excessive stress resulting from the underlying anxiety over possibly losing your DD status. Even though your fears are unfounded, this excessive stress could manifest itself in significantly higher than normal gas utilization rates (which would destroy your dive plan) and/or loss of the ability to concentrate (snorkosis). Might I suggest that, should this happen again, you consider using the DDSnP (Dork Diver Snorkle Patch). It is placed on the left side of the mask skirt where you can easily reach up and touch it for "reassurance" during the dive. It also notifies others that you consider the snorkle an invaluable piece of equipment and would be wearing one except for some unseen circumstance, thus avoiding being misjudged as an NDD. (They also come in various colors to match your actual snorkle). NOTE: For cold water dives where gloves are required, you can "lose touch" with your patch. This is remedied by placing a small pebble under the patch prior to application. - Good luck, and good diving - Chris

 

[trucker girl]

Dear Dork Diver,

Thanks for the pep talk. I'm headed to my LDS (local dork shop) to put in my order for the DDSnP and matching pebble.

It feel good to escape doom (at least for the time being).

TG (aka Cake Girl apparently)

 

[trucker girl]

PS: He can bring his wife along, I'll train her as well

TMI!

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[erparamedic]

Dear Dork Diver,

Thanks for the pep talk. I'm headed to my LDS (local dork shop) to put in my order for the DDSnP and matching pebble.
TG (aka Cake Girl apparently)

Oh... oh... I hope you get this before you head to your local dork shop...

Remember... your DDSnP and pebble do NOT have to match each other, or even your gear! In fact... if I were you, I'd order different colors! It only makes you dorkier! And we all like that!

(This coming from the girl with multi-colored gear and hoses!)

 

[trucker girl]

Yeah- erparamedic's hoses are wrapped! How dorky is that (secretly, I'm jealous!)

 

[trucker girl]

Dear Dork Diver,

I secretly want to get my hoses wrapped with that pretty, brightly-colored netting that erparamedic has on her hoses. But I have neither the funds nor the inclination to get them wrapped. And I'm certainly not going to wrap them myself (I hear it's a job).

Am I doomend?

 

[Land Locked]

trucker girl,
just get some tank wraps, I prefer the narcosis one! You will be the envy of all Dork divers!
http://www.scubatoys.com/store/detail.asp?PRODUCT_ID=TankHyde

 

[CBulla]

Lessee-- diving doubles tomorrow, but doing it my way with only 1st stage and set of regs.. wearing my purple fins and bright orange speedo.

Does that make me a dork?

 

[merxlin]

Lessee-- diving doubles tomorrow, but doing it my way with only 1st stage and set of regs.. wearing my purple fins and bright orange speedo.

Does that make me a dork?

Dear Bulla,

No that does not make you a dork. Scary, but not a dork.....

 

[merxlin]

Dear Dork Divers,

At the start of this last cold dive, my snorkel holder cracked and I nearly lost my yellow snorkel (Gasp!). I am thankful that it landed on the steps leading into the dark waters. Due to my own laziness, I chose to place the snorkel with my buddies gear (close to the entry) rather than huff up the steep steps to my own gear bag, dig through and find my little rubber thingy that will hold a snorkel on. I performed a dive sans snorkel.

Will I somehow loose my status as Dork Diver?

And, am I doomed?

No, but to alleviate future fears, consider the snorkel retractor.......