Dear Dork Divers Advice Column – Ask us your questions

[merxlin]

Dear Dork Diver,

If I go to my local grocery store, buy up enough Fiji water to fill my bathtub, don my gear, and get in, can I log my location in my logbook as Fiji since I have scuba'd in Fiji water?

Thank you,
Coeur

ps - I've always wanted to dive in Fiji.

Dear Coeur,

Absolutely you can. Just watch that back roll in. It can be a real headbanger.

I'd do the same but not many people are impressed with seeing that you dove "gardenhose".

 

[Ber Rabbit]

Dear Coeur,

Absolutely you can. Just watch that back roll in. It can be a real headbanger.

I'd do the same but not many people are impressed with seeing that you dove "gardenhose".

Dear merxlin,
I will be impressed that you dove "Gardenhose Reef". Simply add a few "pool toy" fish and a couple of shells to the bottom of the tub and voila, instant reef.

Dear Coeur,
You should add some pool toys and shells that are common in Fiji to your tub in order to make your dive more realistic. We expect you to post a trip report.
Ber :lilbunny:

 

[Teamcasa]

Dear merxlin,
I will be impressed that you dove "Gardenhose Reef". Simply add a few "pool toy" fish and a couple of shells to the bottom of the tub and voila, instant reef.

Dear Coeur,
You should add some pool toys and shells that are common in Fiji to your tub in order to make your dive more realistic. We expect you to post a trip report.
Ber :lilbunny:

How about the Hot-Tub drift dive?

Dave

Dork Divers Certification Classes – Suggest Course Outlines
Make Suggestions here
http://www.scubaboard.com/showthread.php?t=191955

 

[aowdan]

if you look at my avatar, (although you can't see it all) does this qualify me for DD?

yes, i have a snorkel
yes, i have a computer AND an analogue(conventional) gauge.
yes it's 82 degrees water temp (1mm suit, gloves and 5mm booties)
yes, i have a "spare air"
yes, i used my own boat to get to Looe Key
yes, it was my wife's first U/W pics
yes, moonie will be here in 2 months

dano

 

[CDNScubaMoose]

Dear Dork Diver,

My problem is that I am scared of the dark - how can I enjoy night diving? Will a glow in the dark snorkel help or do I need to take more drastic measures?

 

[Ber Rabbit]

Dear Dork Diver,

My problem is that I am scared of the dark - how can I enjoy night diving? Will a glow in the dark snorkel help or do I need to take more drastic measures?

Dear ScubaMoose,
The key is to have fun! Get some glow in the dark necklaces and attach them to your gear and your body. This is a LOT of fun and when you're having fun it's hard to be scared.
Ber :lilbunny:

 

[fisherdvm]

Dear Dork Diver,

My problem is that I am scared of the dark - how can I enjoy night diving? Will a glow in the dark snorkel help or do I need to take more drastic measures?

Folks who are scared of the dark frequently have a history of distant and cold relationships with their fathers.

You must confront the issues of the past, before addressing the current issue - night diving.

I would suggest that you and your dad go to counseling together, and ask your dad for more hugs. Once you have reestablished this father/son, father/daughter bond, your fear of the dark will evaporate. In the case of Luke Skywalker and his dad, after Star Wars episode 6, he was finally able to sleep without a light on.

 

[J.R.]

Dear Dork Diver,

My problem is that I am scared of the dark - how can I enjoy night diving? Will a glow in the dark snorkel help or do I need to take more drastic measures?

Some issues can be resolved by theraputic applications of glow in the dark necklaces [Ber Rabbit] and some issues may be resolved by counciling and therapy [fisherdvm]... but I believe that the ONLY true way to overcome these issues is by facing them yourself in a measured and controlled path to self discovery.

I would recommend the Dork Diver's Night Diving Anxiety Relief Specialist Class... it involves a series of dives that begin at noon (the brightest part of the day and therefore the least scary)... and end somewhere around 1 A.M. in the darkest dive you can find.

Each dive progresses the student through an environment that is less and less illuminating leaving them progressively in the dark.... but does so in such a way that, by the end of the instructional period, the student is COMPLETELY in the dark and is perfectly comfortable with it.

Other aspects of the class include:

Changing batteries in your underwate light during the dive... CAN IT BE DONE SAFELY?
Using 'glow sticks' as a drink ingredient.
Florescent wet-suits... FACT or FICTION???
Dealing with stress... one drink at a time.
Night Diving... what you would have seen if there was any damn light to see it by...
... and...
It's Dark... I'm Cold... WHY THE HECK AM I HERE? Understanding Compusions...

... hope this helps...

 

[trucker girl]

OMG- how did I miss this! I'm dying of laughter (I'm dying and I'm not even wearing split fins)!

Okay,
Dear Dork Divers,

I recently went diving and found that the water was cold. While I enjoyed my dive for the most part, I found that I did not want to have another dive and that I do not currently want to dive again until it warms up around here or until I go somewhere else.

Am I doomed?

 

[trucker girl]

Dear Dork Divers,

At the start of this last cold dive, my snorkel holder cracked and I nearly lost my yellow snorkel (Gasp!). I am thankful that it landed on the steps leading into the dark waters. Due to my own laziness, I chose to place the snorkel with my buddies gear (close to the entry) rather than huff up the steep steps to my own gear bag, dig through and find my little rubber thingy that will hold a snorkel on. I performed a dive sans snorkel.

Will I somehow loose my status as Dork Diver?

And, am I doomed?