Blonde

[CenTexDivin]

A blonde went into an electronics store and after looking around for a while, asked how much a particular TV was. The salesman replied, "I'm sorry ma'm, but we don't sell to blondes."

The blonde, thinking that she could pull a fast one on the salesman, went home and dyed her hair brown. The next day she returned to the store and asked how much the same TV was. A different salesman replied, "I'm sorry ma'am, but we don't sell to blondes."

Shocked, the woman asked, "How did you know that I was a blonde?" The salesman replied, "Because that's not a TV, it's a microwave.

 

[m3830431]

There are three blondes washed up on an island.

Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish.

The first blonde asks to be intelligent.

Instantly, she is turned Into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island.

The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a ravishing redhead. The redhead builds a boat and sails off the island.

The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.

 

[CenTexDivin]

A blonde, brunette, and redhead have been stuck on a island for weeks, when a magic lamp washes ashore.

The redhead picks it up, rubs it three times and a genie pops out. Seeing the three women, the genie offers to grant each of them one wish.

The redhead goes first and says, "I miss my family and wish I was back with them." *Poof* she disappears off of the island and is reunited at home.

The brunette went next and said, "I miss my family too and want to be back at home." *Poof* The brunette vanished off the island.

Looking around, the blonde realized that she was by herself suddenly and began to sob. The genie asked, "What's wong?" The blonde replied, "I'm so lonely, I wish my friends were here."

 

[scubachick01]

Sick Leave


I urgently needed a few days off work but I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted "Crazy" he would tell me to take a few days off. So, I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises.

My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb, so that the Boss might think I was "Crazy" and give me a few days off.

A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, "What in the name of good GOD are you doing?"

I told him I was a light bulb.

He said, "You are clearly stressed out." Go home and recuperate for a couple of days."

I jumped down and walked out of the office...

When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her, "..And where do you think you're going?!"




She said, "I'm going home, too. You can't possibly expect me to work in the dark!

 

[emcbride81]

There are three blondes washed up on an island.

Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish.

The first blonde asks to be intelligent.

Instantly, she is turned Into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island.

The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a ravishing redhead. The redhead builds a boat and sails off the island.

The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.

 

[Hemlon]

[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.

"I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat the procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds."

When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds.

"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says. "Did you follow my instructions?"

The blonde nods. "I'll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day." "From hunger, you mean?" said the doctor.

"No, from skipping," replied the blonde.[/FONT]

ROFL....perfect!

 

[kilo_fox]

[FONT=&quot]A Blonde walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops a coke. The blonde looks amazed and runs away to get some more coins. She returns and starts feeding the machine madly and of course the machine keeps feeding out drinks. Another person walks up behind the blonde and wtahces her antics for a few minutes before stopping and asking if someone else could have a go. The blonde spins around and shouts in her face, "Can't you see I'm winning?!"[/FONT]

 

[m3830431]

 

[kilo_fox]

[FONT=&quot]What are the worst 6 years of a blonde's life?












3rd grade.[/FONT]

 

[Dzscubie]

How do you drown a blonde?

"Glue a mirror on the bottom of the swimming pool"