Strongly agreed with the rest of your post, and mostly agree with this. The 3cu could be enough to aid in what's effectively assisted-CESA. If I absolutely had nothing else available, but a 3cu, I'd take it. I'd also be FAR more cautious, if that's all I had.
The part where it becomes dangerous, is if the diver thinks the spare-air offers them far more redundancy than it actually provides. The diver might be willing to push more limits, or in an OOA might fail to treat it as an assisted-CESA. A diver with a spare-air suggests they may be unaware of those limits, because for a similar amount of time and money you could acquire a "real" pony bottle and regs.
If I saw a diver with one, I'd probably check to see if they were aware of those limitations or the alternatives, because I too was that diver for a (thankfully) very short time. A quick conversation would reveal whether they're using it for assisted-CESA, simply don't have anything else, or perhaps they really could use some knowledge, tips, and advice. The fact that someone went out of their way to get and carry a spare-air is a good sign. Unfortunately, dive-agencies tell beginner-to-intermediate divers absolutely nothing about redundant air, leaving them to figure it out on their own.
The "wrong" advice of course would be to tell them "don't use a pony," when I could have taken those few seconds or minutes to point them towards an AL19 or similar.
Good points. Especially as a mostly solo diver, if my buddy is insistent on swimming off, doing something dangerous, or diving in a completely incompatible way, I'm not going to chase after them or baby-sit them.