I've only ever bought one car, and did a bunch of research online before we headed into town to go shopping. Same thing you're doing - I checked up on basic strategy (on both sides), read a bunch of forums, combed the hell out of Edmunds / KBB / NADA, etc. We also knew exactly what type of car we wanted, and roughly what year / mileage was acceptable. There were several in town, and I put the information for all of them on a spreadsheet, and brought it with me (along with KBB/NADA pricing information), when we went to the dealership.
Our rough strategy was to go to the dealer an hour or two before they closed, in the middle of the week, in the beginning of winter, figuring that no one would be out looking at cars. We were right - we were the only people I saw in both the new and used sales lots. We took the car (our first choice based on previous information), for a test drive and confirmed that it was exactly what we were looking for. We then told the salesman and his manager (who was on his way out the door) that we were prepared to buy the car this evening, we just needed to agree on final pricing. Negotiating wasn't painful, and we ended up paying a little bit less than we had intended to (based on our pre-research).
The initial price we offered was $17,500 (asking was $21,500), which was met with $19,500 + $2000 in dealer fees ($21,500). I countered with $18k, out the door, and laid out the reasons why I felt that was a fair offer. I gave the salesman printouts from KBB and NADA that I had prepared for the vehicle we were looking at, using information from the Dealer's site, and also reminded him that I still had $1500 in shipping costs to get the vehicle home (we live on an island.) I also told him that we were only in town for a few days and didn't have a lot of time to look around or haggle, but that we knew that Dealers X, Y and Z had similar vehicles on their lot and would be open for another hour.
A brief (maybe two minutes?) discussion with his manager, and they accepted our offer. We probably could have done even better, but were only after what we perceived to be a "fair" price. We ended up at a little below the KBB private party value, and a little above dealer wholesale, which was what we were after. With the fees included, I think it was even a little better than that.
As we were buying a three year old vehicle, we insisted that they take it to a mechanic of our choosing to be looked over. Wasn't an issue and I think the local well-respected import shop charged us something like $100 for the inspection. Confirmed that everything the dealer told us about the vehicle was accurate, and no issues were found. They also suggested a few preventative maintenance items that turned out to be very helpful down the line (serp belt due for replacement in 2000 miles, grab one before you leave town, your oil filter is going to be hard to find where you live, grab a couple of those too, etc.).
The next evening we went back to finalize things and when the Sales Manager presented the final invoice, I noticed it was $18,075, when we had all agreed on $18k, OTD. The other $75 was for DMV fees, which should have been included. I let him know very bluntly that I wasn't at all pleased, but also that I didn't have the time, nor the energy to argue with him over $75. It was late by then, and I wanted to get out of there with time to go grab a decent dinner. Suppose I was lucky that my impatience only cost $75.
We signed the paperwork, wrote a check, and left with the car. A week later I checked the mail and there was a check from the dealer for $75. I'm taking a guess that the sales process was reviewed by the sales manager's manager and they decided to make it right. They've been easy to work with since the sale too. We lost the key in a snowbank, and they sent us three replacements. When a warranty issue popped up we initially got some run-around from Toyota, but their service department manager went out of his way to iron things out.
Next time around I hope our situation is such that we're not trying to take care of all of the car-buying stuff in two days. That was a bit hectic and could have worked against us if the dealer hadn't wanted to sell a car that evening. Also, next time I'm not sitting around for 2-3 hours while they write up the sales paperwork. They can call me when its done.
Oh, and if you buy a used car - make sure to get more than one key =p
You're on the right track - lots of good advice in this thread.
-B