Would you lend, or accept, a hand when diving?

[boulderjohn]

Huh? I'm 210 lbs. How are you going to help me to get out of the water if you can't get yourself of the water with gear on?

You can get carried away with this kind of thinking.

Here is a picture of me planning a dive with my dive buddy. You may note the disparity in size. Note the means of getting into and out of the water. Yes, we both put our gear on and off in the water. Oddly enough, I was not remotely worried about her ability to assist me in an emergency. It did not even enter my mind.

 

[berndo]

You can get carried away with this kind of thinking.

What are you talking about? Does the woman in the picture have issues getting out of the water by herself with the gear she's using? If she is way smaller AND has issue with her own stuff, you should spend some time thinking about what the 'ifs'.
Looks like a 3rd person took that pic. As said in my initial post, in some cases it's a better option to dive in a 3 man team.
She might be able to get you on that platform if she's in ok shape. The size difference doesn't seem all that bad in that pic.

 

[jwarrenod]

I didn’t hit 60 as hard as it hit me!
So I am still diving with an easier to carry HP65, but due to hip issues, could really use a hand standing at end of dive.
I know other long term divers hit the terminus at different speeds, facing different difficulties.
My question is, what level of help would you feel safe accepting or giving to keep an older diver on a regular dive schedule?
Thoughts and ideas welcome, snark not welcome.

I always ask someone who seems to be having an issue if I can help them, if the accept, great. If not, also great. To not help is a dick move IMO. If someone gets offended by an offer to help, same thing as not offering, but I won't let it affect my attitude for the day.

AT 57, I can use some help from time to time too. We're all there for the same thing, why not do it together to the benefit of all?

JW

 

[chillyinCanada]

This is actually a complicated question and not easy to answer ;

I will offer whatever help someone needs as the occasion calls for and accept help for things like the maddening soft sand step that can form at low tide when we have super calm like like conditions.

but

if I was being asked to help someone constantly, the same person who showed up unable to function with out help who also hasn’t made their own arrangements for such help, meaning a regular dive buddy sort of thing, I would be a bit put out, I accept my own risk of injury handling my own gear but to constantly doubling my risk is off putting.

this is just how I do life but once I can’t handle myself I’ll give up diving because I wouldn’t want to risk anyone else’s health for my entertainment.

if the OP’s situation I would go for the hip replacement and hope it works out, did it with my knee and was back diving in 33 days, I have a hip that has been nagging me lately but not enought to take the replacement step just yet.

getting old sucks, the alternative is not great.

short answer is, it depends.

Do you know for sure that your hip will need replacing? It could be that you merely need a set of physio exercises to improve your situation.

 

[stepfen]

Going through the replies I see that most of the posts so far are about older people or people needing (or not needing) extra help etc.
Maybe my story is a bit out of topic because it doesn't fall in any of these categories but anyway, I'm saying it as I find it quite interesting.

I did my OW cert dives together with a young (around maybe 20yo maybe even younger) lady (among other people). She was perfectly healthy and physically able to handle everything herself.

During the first (shore) dives I noticed the instructor helping (i.e. doing it for her) donning and strapping her fins.
Next day we were preparing for a boat dive. She was seated just across myself on the boat and the instructor was busy doing other stuff at the back. After I got ready (weights, BCD/tank, fins etc all on) I noticed that she had her BCD/tank,weight etc on, but fins on the floor and she was looking at me, then her fins, back to me and all over again for few times. The message was clear. My reply was even clearer - I pretended I don't see/understand anything.
After a while she got the message - her face became quite upset as she was bending trying putting her own fins on herself. With some frustration and effort (as it was probably the first time ever she did it herself) she managed it fine.

I usually do help people, quite often I offer help even before I am asked when I see people struggle, but in that case I felt that if somebody is not even willing to try put his/her own fins on, diving is not for him/her. It was not about her abilities. It was about her mentality.

 

[chillyinCanada]

Going through the replies I see that most of the posts so far are about older people or people needing (or not needing) extra help etc.
Maybe my story is a bit out of topic because it doesn't fall in any of these categories but anyway, I'm saying it as I find it quite interesting.

I did my OW cert dives together with a young (around maybe 20yo maybe even younger) lady (among other people). She was perfectly healthy and physically able to handle everything herself.

During the first (shore) dives I noticed the instructor helping (i.e. doing it for her) donning and strapping her fins.
Next day we were preparing for a boat dive. She was seated just across myself on the boat and the instructor was busy doing other stuff at the back. After I got ready (weights, BCD/tank, fins etc all on) I noticed that she had her BCD/tank,weight etc on, but fins on the floor and she was looking at me, then her fins, back to me and all over again for few times. The message was clear. My reply was even clearer - I pretended I don't see/understand anything.
After a while she got the message - her face became quite upset as she was bending trying putting her own fins on herself. With some frustration and effort (as it was probably the first time ever she did it herself) she managed it fine.

I usually do help people, quite often I offer help even before I am asked when I see people struggle, but in that case I felt that if somebody is not even willing to try put his/her own fins on, diving is not for him/her. It was not about her abilities. It was about her mentality.

It was also partly the instructor's fault. And you're a meanie.

 

[lexvil]

Do you know for sure that your hip will need replacing? It could be that you merely need a set of physio exercises to improve your situation.

In time, I put a lot of pressure on it before the knee replacement so it’s beat up but hasn’t held e back yet.

 

[chillyinCanada]

In time, I put a lot of pressure on it before the knee replacement so it’s beat up but hasn’t held e back yet.

Why not start with the exercises so that you can fix the issue without continuing to damage your hip?

 

[lexvil]

Why not start with the exercises so that you can fix the issue without continuing to damage your hip?

Don’t tell me what to do Canada lady!

I do a bit of those things, I’m on my 7th year after the knee, some parts just wear out but I’ve been holding my own. I’ll hit 69 yo by the end of the year, my 10 year younger dive buddy says he hopes he can do what I do when he gets to my age, I hope so too because I don’t want to have to break in a new buddy

 

[MB NZ]

I don't know what to say to someone who has already given up diving.

You don't have to say anything. It is what it is. I've very much enjoyed the five dives I've done over the last couple of weeks and there will be a lot more to come over the next two months. At close to 1000 dives, there isn't very much I want to do or see, I just enjoy floating around in warm, clear water with a camera. I don't find the diving where I live particularly inspiring and dive travel isn't compatible with my family life. At least not the kind of dive travel I enjoy. A serious injury or debilitating condition would finish it for me.