I thought about posting the whole e-mail but because I named some of the other sick divers I thought better of it. For now, suffice it to say it was an explination of the events almost exactly as they were posted here.
You know it's interesting to me how people reacted to my excerpt. I just read it, yet again, and while I was delibertly direct and to the point I still don't find it heavy handed, rude or uncompromizing. If I did I wouldn't have posted it.
I said "I propose we use" the following method for calculating a refund and "Please advise how you would like to handle this transaction?" The operative word being "you."
The complexion EV put on it isn't a big surprise.
You could of course remove the names to protect the innocent.
There is another thread going right now where it has been said, basically, that it doesn't really matter what you said, it's what the recipient thinks you said.
I'm not saying one party is right and one party is wrong, I'm just saying the truth is almost always somewhere on a sliding scale between two points. It's vitally important when two sides are communicating, especially when in writing, to make sure your message is very clear and that your tone is suited to the purpose. You have to write with your audience in mind and from the excerpt shown I think you could have done better. I'll also say that EV's response here in this thread could have been written better as well.