Spouses make bad buddies?

[sharky60]

1.) no, my wife and I know each other better than anyone else, we work great as a team and I would put her having a cool head in stress situation before someone I've never met.

2.) no, and would probably be my last trip on that boat without a REAL good reason.

3.) no, there are always exceptions and a DM does have the right to make safety decisions, but to make an assumption that spouses in general are too dependant on each other, and break them up as a company policy would just be crazy.

besides, I need her to spot photo ops for me. She's gotten really good at spotting critters for me to shoot!

 

[dvr4lyf]

http://www.scubaboard.com/showthread.php?t=117625&highlight=dvr4lyf
Thought this might help.
Tuff call for me, as much as I would LOVE to have her w/me, I would never do anything to endanger her.
Thanks for the post!!!!

Safe diving!

 

[RumBum]

I dive mostly with my husband. We were both divers before we met, although I was very fresh out of my OW class. He helped me learn the finer points of diving. Now I am an independent diver and have gone diving without him when he was unable to equalize. When I dove with another buddy, I was so used to my husband understanding me u/w that I was surprised when the new buddy did not understand me immediately. Actually, I think I would like to dive with others sometimes just to become more rounded. For example, I would like to learn some new kicking styles but I don't like the kick my husband uses. If I dove with others then I could learn their styles. I am sure there are other things that other divers do that we could learn just from being exposed to other divers.
Overall, though, spouses make wonderful buddies as long as both divers are competent as individuals. If they are not competent individually then they would hopefully want to work apart. A DM could suggest the couple try splitting up and explain why s/he feels it would benefit each diver; I don't think it should be forced.

 

[Humu-out-of-Water]

I took my OW class WITHOUT my husband. Very glad I did! I was in a class with some couples and there was alot of male-dependancy/co-dependancy. I have never felt as empowered as I did knowing I earned my cert by MYSELF. Husband WILL be my dive buddy and I think it will work out well... newly certified so our first dives together will be next month.
Cheryl
( also, I am small and not that physically strong ..yet.. so it was challanging but rewarding to complete alot of the out-of-water tasks... ie. lifting!

 

[DivePartner1]

A: No
B: No
C: No

Your question really has nothing to do with marriage but rather with compatability among divers of different levels or who are disfunctional as a team. Even here, C is out of bounds as described.

The DM has no business breaking a buddy team unless one or both are patently unprepared to dive. Even in that case, the DM should be to beaching one or both, but she should not second guess the teaming arrangement unless one of the team asks her to.

I'd refuse to dive with a DM who would intefere with my buddy team. My wife is one of the safest divers I know. We met as dive buddies, 5 or so years before we married. As the buddy in my first warm water dive (6th overall) on the Bloody Bay Wall of all places, she had well over a thousand dives as a diver for a research institute in the Pacific. We buddied up mostly because our temperments matched more than the rest of the egos on the trip, but found we dive well together as well.

With hundreds of dives under my belt since then she is still my first choice. We know our experience and skills, and share a calm, cautious approach to diving. She is as comfortable under the water as I have become and we are both calm in an emergency.

Looking back to my first dives with my wife, if we were married then and some DM had separated me from the most experienced diver on the trip by far (and the only one not to brag about it) to one of my comparativley unskliled passport diving friends (avg. of maybe one warm water trip every 3 or 4 years), that would not have been an appropriate match.

 

[DivePartner1]

1.) . . .

besides, I need her to spot photo ops for me. She's gotten really good at spotting critters for me to shoot!

And my wife is the best shark spotter I've ever met, too!

 

[teknitrox]

it all depends on the skill and comfort that you have in the water together.
I had diving girlfriends before I got married, and some of them would irritate me for various reasons, lack of skill etc.
My wife is an impeccable diver and I always admire her in the water, think she's graceful and smart, etc. That's one of the reasons why I knew that she was the one, her diving is so great I knew that she was the coolest.
Now there is no one (except my brother, awesome diver too) who I would rather dive with.
We have some differences which work as balances, for example, she does not like to go below 40M, which I respect. So, for my deeper air and technical diving I go with different groups. when we dive together, it is recreational, and fun, and full of love and respect for each other.
if anyone tried to split us up I would consider it an affront and never patronize his establishment again. I agree with the instructor who does not like teaching couples, however I must add that couples are even better than trying to teach your own sibling or parent. That is a definitely no-no for safety and sanity reasons.

 

[rmannix]

I've experienced a few OWA situations, not pretty.

 

[boulderjohn]

I have seen many excellent husband/wife dive pairs. They knew each other's habits, equipment, etc. They communicated extremely well.

The only time I remember seeing any problem at all was a pair on Cayman Brac. When they came out of the water, the DM noticed she wasn't wearing a computer, and he asked her for her dive specifics. She started to go over to her husband, but the DM would not let her. She said that they always shared his computer. THe DM asked for her tables. She didn't have any.

So, she had to sit out the second tank of the trip and take care of that problem on shore before they would let her in the water again.

My wife is a non-diver because of past ear damage. I really wish she could dive--I would much rather have her as a buddy than always go onto each trip in search of an instabuddy.

 

[Zenshift]

Isn't this the sort of thing that is stressed in classes: if you are uncomfortable for any reason... don't dive. An uncomfortable diver is a threat no matter who they are. Could you imagine being buddied up with someone elses freaked out spouse? What the hell does that accomplish? I understand the value of gaining confidence by yourself, but sheesh, at what cost?