Some thoughts about diving alone

[ScubaGypsy]

I don't want this thread to turn into a solo diving bashfest.

When I was in High School we lived on a Navy base in Puerto Rico where there was a reef across the street. I free dove and spearfished 2-4 times per week solo. My parents and I never gave it anymore concern then sailing off shore alone or going out to shoot baskets alone. When I became NASDS certified in 1986, our instructor stressed the importance of being self reliant as most folks were solo diving locally. When I became active again (50+ dives/yr) around 2004 all of the sudden solo diving was high risk. What happened between the early 1990's to 2004 to condemn solo diving?

My wife, three sons and I have had these solo diving risk discussions as each of us are divers and understand the implications. However my wife and I also believe in the solace and personal enrichment that solo diving offers though we typically dive together. I travel significantly for work and try to bring my dive gear with me. Though I enjoy meeting up with various folks around the country (and some international), I will solo if I don't find others to go. I rather be out diving than sitting in a hotel room watching television. It's a wonderful way to learn about the area and it provides an enriching level of personal enjoyment and stress relief as I find that I focus purely on the dive while placing other life issues on hold. NWGratefulDiver's post is a beautiful expression of the value I find in solo diving.

Wes was on a rebreather, Steve was in a cave. John was on a shallow wreck. It's not selective at all.

I don't find solo or cave diving a significant risk but rebreathers scare the heck out of me!

 

[mikemill]

Honestly, if the idea that you may die and your family might not have answers is such a big deal to you then you really shouldn't be diving at all. Separation is always a possibility even in a close team. If you separate and have another issue and die then there will be no one there that'll know what happened. In fact it might be even worse for the family ("He/she was with you before and you just left them behind?").

Divers enter a hostile environment but we accept those risks. One of those risks is that our family might not know the how of our death. So if it is a big deal, talk about it or give up taking that risk.

As for me, I'll just plan on not dying

 

[Cave Diver]

I don't find solo or cave diving a significant risk but rebreathers scare the heck out of me!

I think everything you add increases the risk.

Dive caves, risk goes up. Dive rebreather, risk goes up. Dive solo, risk goes up.

Dive cave + rebreather, solo + cave, or solo + rebreather it goes up even more.

Solo + rebreather + cave, well...

 

[Teamcasa]

...I have no idea if having a buddy would have changed the outcome for any of these men, but it certainly gives pause for thought.

How many lives were saved by a buddy assistance?
A good buddy is one who may be able to transform a tragedy into a simple accident/mistake/failure dive story.

 

[Cave Diver]

How many lives were saved by a buddy assistance?
A good buddy is one who may be able to transform a tragedy into a simple accident/mistake/failure dive story.

I agree, but by the same token that could go the other way as well. A poor buddy choice could lead to a fatality, or double fatality.

I'm thankful to have a good buddy so this is a non-issue for me. And I've made it clear to my friends and family that if something should happen to me while diving, it's likely my fault because I screwed up.

 

[MXGratefulDiver]

Even a good buddy has to recognize that there's a problem in progress in time to do something about it ... and they won't necessarily be able to change the outcome.

... Bob (Grateful Diver)

 

[AndyNZ]

Honestly, if the idea that you may die and your family might not have answers is such a big deal to you then you really shouldn't be diving at all. Separation is always a possibility even in a close team.

Agreed. You only have to read the DAN reports to realise that separation is in fact one of the most significant factors in many accidents.


I agree with your sentiments, Lynne - but the "lack of knowing" is a factor in many deaths. In a head on collision involving two cars that kills both drivers, will we ever know what truly happened? In a hit and run whilst crossing the road, will we ever know? How many people who have had cancer have asked the questions "Why?" and pondered whether it was the fumigation of their house back in '84 or whether it was high altitude exposure to UV rays?

Uncertainty and lack of knowing is implicit in every loss - even in the case where you know everything that happened, you will beat yourself up over not being there. Sure the buddy says that did everything they could.... but really, did they? Could you have done more? If you had been there, would it have made a difference? These questions will plague people who suffer a loss. It is part of the grieving process, and "knowing" doesn't change whether or not you grieve, or make it shorter or easier.... it just changes what you beat yourself up about whilst you come to terms with your loss.

 

[Jim Lapenta]

Jeff's buddy was holding him when he toxed in the cave. Made no difference. My solo diving has been discussed and those with the need to know have the arrangement details.

 

[FritzCat66]

I didn't interpret Lynne's original post as saying anything negative about solo diving per se, but rather whether it is better and more comforting for family & friends to think that someone was there, that they didn't reach for help and not find any, that they died quickly/painlessly, etc.

But ultimately, death is always a solo dive. I envy Skiles and can't think of a better situation to die than doing what I like best. I presume his family knew him and understand that as well, even if no dive buddy was around to give them the particulars.

Some of you may remember the incident with SB user littlejohn a year or so ago. I was his buddy on what turned out to be his final dive. But as sad as that is, I know for a fact he really enjoyed that dive, and if you're going to go out, might as well be doing what you love.

I work in a hospital where many people die slow deaths surrounded by plenty of loved ones and caregivers. That's one way to go, and perhaps offers easier closure for those friends and family. Yet if I have any choice whatsoever in the matter (knowing that I probably don't), I would gladly choose the way of Skiles or littlejohn, even knowing that it might be tougher for friends or family.

I would trust that, ultimately, they will understand, even if that understanding comes with poignancy.

 

[Pearldiver07]

I don't want this thread to turn into a solo diving bashfest. All I wanted to do was raise the issue of what family and loved ones might think, or how they might feel differently about someone who died diving alone, versus someone whose buddy could tell them that he did everything he could to save his friend, and who could perhaps shed some light on what actually happened (as Richard Mork's buddy, and Denton Byers' buddy did). Having the story could answer questions and put issues to rest for those who have to do the grieving.

Interesting, but I have to ask if this fear of being alone when you (and we all will eventually) die, does this impact other aspects of your life? I am all but positive that driving to the dive site carries as much mortal risk as the diving.

Many are found alone at home having passed on. And as a few have pointed out, in various activities as well. Would you not jog alone?

I have also had several discussions with my family about this. I have had a few times in my life that I thought I was experiencing my last day. I have come to accept that I WILL DIE, just as we all will. If I die diving, then my last minutes of my life should have been some of the best (with the very last minute or two notwithstanding).

You can't spend your life fearing an inevitability (sp?). Yes, you can contribute to the details regarding the timing by mitigating risk. My biggest personal fear regarding death is that on my last day that I regret not doing all that I could while still alive.