Silly things heard on dive trips

[Garrobo]

Most of the, not necessarily dumb, remarks I have heard have been around the air we breath. Most people think that we breath pure oxygen, not compressed air. Many times I have heard on the news the expression "oxygen tanks" along with some news items in the newspaper. Others find it odd that the air only lasts for about an hour. Some think that we can go down hundreds of feet and stay there on one tank. Of course, I believed the same things before I took up diving myself.

 

[Doc]

Silly things heard on dive trips

Real diver's ears are so messed up you really can't hear anymore.

Maybe just the horror of watching is enough.

Hmmm. Good thing there are no mirrors on the dive deck.

OK, here's one I heard before going deaf:

Excited Diver Gal/Guy - Where can I get, ummmm, five mason jars?

Cayman DM - Uh, I guess so, sure, uhhhh, why?

EDG - I want to snorkel out and get jars full of the different colors of water out there.

________

EDG - Is this island completely surrounded by water?

________

EDG - Can you swim under the island?

 

[MXGratefulDiver]

On our dive trip to Belize ... talking to a lady on our boat ...

Her - How much do you normally tip divemasters back home?

Me - We don't dive with divemasters back home.

Her - Isn't that dangerous?

... Bob (Grateful Diver)

 

[String]

Woman: "I was a bit overweighted on that dive"
Husband: "How do you know?"
Woman: "I hit the bottom harder than normal"

That was on a day boat on Molasses Reef, Key Largo.

No wonder the reef there is utterly destroyed and in incredibly poor shape!

 

[JKPAO]

On a boat diving out of Hawaii I heard another diver say to the divemaster
..."is it the same water on the other side?"

"I know I don't have to remind you we just left an island"(DM)

See you topside! John

 

[RJP]

Woman: "I was a bit overweighted on that dive"
Husband: "How do you know?"
Woman: "I hit the bottom harder than normal"

Now that just about sums it all up, doesn't it!

 

[charlesml3]

I heard one on a trip to Cozumel a couple of years ago. We were discussing the little puddle jumper that flies between Cozumel and Cancun several times a day. Of course, that led into the endless argument of "When is it safe to fly after diving." Seeing as how that flight doesn't even hit 3000 feet you could probably dive that morning and still be safe to fly it.

Anyway, this woman beside me was all about "Oh no... we NEVER fly with less than a 24 hour delay. See, we have dive computers and we wouldn't want them to shut down on us." Somehow this twit figured her dive computer somehow "knew" she was flying and would shut down like a blown mandatory deco stop.

-Charles

 

[TwoBitTxn]

A number of years ago we had a Swamp divers get together at Lake Travis. It was a camping weekend and a big T-storm rolled through one night. There was another family that was camping nearby and appearently it was a first camping trip as they had failed to put the rain fly on the tent.

An adult commented that we had all managed to say dry and one of the kids makes the statement... "They had those rubber suits they could put on"

 

[Doc Intrepid]

"Somehow this twit figured her dive computer somehow "knew" she was flying and would shut down like a blown mandatory deco stop."

Dunno about all of'em. But generally, DCs benchmark against ATA. More complex DC algorithms will recognize reduced ATA at altitude - such as high altitude diving - and will re-calc for dives made at high altitudes. Its plausible that they may have some DC that may indeed sense reduced ATA while flying and default to error. Never heard of it, but with all the new computers coming out, hell, anything is possible.

 

[RJP]

...they had failed to put the rain fly on the tent.

Kind of like a dry suit: You have the perception that you will be dry, but the addition of water into the equation changes the reallity!