coreyh
Registered
Yeah, I'm just going to need you to come in on Saturday, umm kay? And, why don't you go ahead and come in on Sunday too. Yeah, oh kay thanks.
Kids!!!!!!!!!
- Thread starter jepuskar
- Start date
Please register or login
Welcome to ScubaBoard, the world's largest scuba diving community. Registration is not required to read the forums, but we encourage you to join. Joining has its benefits and enables you to participate in the discussions.
Benefits of registering include
- Ability to post and comment on topics and discussions.
- A Free photo gallery to share your dive photos with the world.
- You can make this box go away
kjunheart
Contributor
This is a sensitive issue but how do you really know? I tried really hard not to put my two cents in but just cant resist
IMHO, all of our steadfast opinions and thoughts on having/not having children are just that opinions. I am not even looking for responses here (although I welcome them) I guess this is more rhetorical statements/questions to be put out there and make a few people think. Bottom line, given different circumstances would you still be so vehement about wanting children?
The first question is to the women out there that say they never want children and have taken, to quote Kat, total control over your reproductive choices. Mind you, this question is coming from someone who is an AVID supporter of womens right to choose. When it comes down to it, do you REALLY know what your choice would be if you found yourself to be pregnant? Unfortunately precautions (with the exception of abstenance) can fail. Have you ever been there? If not, how can you say what you would do if you were faced with the decision to have the child you are carrying or terminate the pregnancy? (If you have already been faced with the situation, you dont have to comment if you dont want to. It isnt anyones business really.) But as you make those decisions, you should think of or better yet, ask women - not just one or two - who have been in that situation, how circumstances (relationships, physical, mental) possibly altered their decisions. Say what you want, but how do you know what you will decide until you are there?
To the guys out there. The same question but with different twists. The two of you have taken all the proper precautions and she comes to you and says she is pregnant. So many different scenarios for you. Do you make the decision together? Do you try to convince her not to have the baby because of your views on children? Given the fact that it is ultimately her decision to make, what would you do if she said she is having the baby? Have you ever thought about what your role would be in that situation? Would you bail on her and the child because it isnt what you want? Or do you think, after the shock has worn off, that you might actually embrace being a father? This is where your true choice comes into play. No matter what, you will be a father it just depends on what role take in that childs life. Do you know what you would choose?
Things to make you go "Hmmm"....
Sandy
IMHO, all of our steadfast opinions and thoughts on having/not having children are just that opinions. I am not even looking for responses here (although I welcome them) I guess this is more rhetorical statements/questions to be put out there and make a few people think. Bottom line, given different circumstances would you still be so vehement about wanting children?
The first question is to the women out there that say they never want children and have taken, to quote Kat, total control over your reproductive choices. Mind you, this question is coming from someone who is an AVID supporter of womens right to choose. When it comes down to it, do you REALLY know what your choice would be if you found yourself to be pregnant? Unfortunately precautions (with the exception of abstenance) can fail. Have you ever been there? If not, how can you say what you would do if you were faced with the decision to have the child you are carrying or terminate the pregnancy? (If you have already been faced with the situation, you dont have to comment if you dont want to. It isnt anyones business really.) But as you make those decisions, you should think of or better yet, ask women - not just one or two - who have been in that situation, how circumstances (relationships, physical, mental) possibly altered their decisions. Say what you want, but how do you know what you will decide until you are there?
To the guys out there. The same question but with different twists. The two of you have taken all the proper precautions and she comes to you and says she is pregnant. So many different scenarios for you. Do you make the decision together? Do you try to convince her not to have the baby because of your views on children? Given the fact that it is ultimately her decision to make, what would you do if she said she is having the baby? Have you ever thought about what your role would be in that situation? Would you bail on her and the child because it isnt what you want? Or do you think, after the shock has worn off, that you might actually embrace being a father? This is where your true choice comes into play. No matter what, you will be a father it just depends on what role take in that childs life. Do you know what you would choose?
Things to make you go "Hmmm"....
Sandy
plsdiver4377
Guest
- Messages
- 399
- Reaction score
- 1
- # of dives
- 200 - 499
I guess I'm the number 8 type. I like kids just fine as long as they are someone elses. I also seem to be the bad kid magnet type as well, have been hit by food being thrown by someone elses brat not once but three times. That said, I love my godchildren like they are my own (except they go home when either they or I have had enough). I take them fishing, to the park, etc. just like all the favorite "uncles" do. I am also honest enough with myself to know that I don't want to be saddled with the full time responsibility of raising children,or dealing with raising them in this somewhat crazy world we live in today. Besides with 2 horses, 6 dogs, 1 fish, more hobbies than I have time for, oh! and working 60 hrs a week I don't have time to do it responsibly. Sorry this is so long but I have to go through this every 6 months or so with the "grandparents", especially since I'm pushing 40 hard now. Thanks for the rant.:boom:
Move to a remote Caribbean island and leave no forwarding address...
Spectre
Contributor
Every situation is different, and I completely agree that you can only speculate until you find yourself in the situation and truely have to decide.
Personally I would have to cop out of the question and wait to hear her opinions on the matter. What does she want, and what role does she want me to take? Those answers definately focus my 'choices'. And then of course there is the whole situation of the relationship with the mother-to-be that also heavily effects what the choice would be.
Zeina
Contributor
Oh shoot, that wouldn't help, I'm the woman here...
kjunheart
Contributor
On the work issue again it is about choices on both sides. I dont know what kind of work you do so this is a bit off the cuff. But the parent has made two choices IMO. He/she has decided that family is first and also has decided to take the risk of not being as (for lack of a better word) dependable. With some companies, those choices can later lead to repercussions. You have chosen to take on that additional load because of your work ethic and hopefully will be rewarded for your efforts later.
To me life is all about choices. Each person has their own set of values and arent most choices based on your beliefs/values and what you deem to be important? Who decides who is right or wrong?
kjunheart
Contributor
Zeina once bubbled...
Oh shoot, that wouldn't help, I'm the woman here...
LOL
Aquabella
Guest
Holy chit!
More like ...Things that make you go BARF!
MURDER
Guess where I stand on this one? And yes...I have been there.
I'm so glad I logged on here today to read this beautiful thread...It has seriously made me feel ill.
Here's another point of view...I don't care if any of you have kids, I really don't, It's your loss. And no, I'm not sharing any of my four precious boys that I raise alone. Git yer own.
And WAH WAH about the work problems...if it's a real emergency...then don't you have any compassion? If it's not than you're just a sucker.
BARF BARF BARF BARF BARF!
I'm out of here........................................
More like ...Things that make you go BARF!
MURDER
Guess where I stand on this one? And yes...I have been there.
I'm so glad I logged on here today to read this beautiful thread...It has seriously made me feel ill.
Here's another point of view...I don't care if any of you have kids, I really don't, It's your loss. And no, I'm not sharing any of my four precious boys that I raise alone. Git yer own.
And WAH WAH about the work problems...if it's a real emergency...then don't you have any compassion? If it's not than you're just a sucker.
BARF BARF BARF BARF BARF!
I'm out of here........................................
We have no need for closed mindedness in here...why don't you go argue with a wall...
Now, back to intelligent conversation please...
Now, back to intelligent conversation please...
Similar threads
