If your significant other doesn't want to learn to dive DON'T Pressure them!!!
- Thread starter Ann Marie
- Start date
Please register or login
Welcome to ScubaBoard, the world's largest scuba diving community. Registration is not required to read the forums, but we encourage you to join. Joining has its benefits and enables you to participate in the discussions.
Benefits of registering include
- Ability to post and comment on topics and discussions.
- A Free photo gallery to share your dive photos with the world.
- You can make this box go away
offroaddiver
Guest
I have dated several women in the few years i've been alive. current gf was certified long before i came into the picture. We've been together for a few years now and planning to tie the not after debt free (or atleast managable debt and out of college). previously to her i had a horrible time with gf's and them jealous of female dive buddies that i got set up with on trips. Coming home smelling of neoprene and lake water isn't a turn on to non diving women, as i soon found out. Money always came up even though i'd save up for dive gear and have a lil extra aside for big sales.
I've tried getting ex's to join me but they didn't last long enough to take lessons anyways. If you are dating someone common interests make things more stable. Every time me and my gf have had a big fight we spend time together rekindling either hiking, scuba diving, or one of our other passions and common interests. Now some of her interests... i have no need to get involved but i am supportive non the less.
I've tried getting ex's to join me but they didn't last long enough to take lessons anyways. If you are dating someone common interests make things more stable. Every time me and my gf have had a big fight we spend time together rekindling either hiking, scuba diving, or one of our other passions and common interests. Now some of her interests... i have no need to get involved but i am supportive non the less.
I would never dream of asking my wife to learn to dive with me. Who's gonna watch the kids while I'm diving?
DivingPrincessE
Contributor
I don't know how divers can date a non-diver. Since I got certified, all the vacations I've taken have been dive trips. It would be bad enough not to see my SO during weekends in the summer but to only see them for a few hours before going to bed on vacations...I just don't see how someone could sustain a relationship like that.
OP
I do take 'dive trip' vacations with dive buddies. I also take regular vacations with my husband. His passion is golf. Do I want to do that -- heck no! This summer we are going to Jamaica (not a dive vacation). He'll golf (probably 2 days) and I'll dive while he golfs and then together we'll snorkel and do other activities.
I've also got the following dive vacations planned: Hawaii, the Keys, and DEMA (though there will be no diving)with friends. These will be diving trips.
Last night, I was teaching an Open Water Course; he went to the gym. I guess we just make it work.
I'm sure there are couples that couldn't do what we do and have AIDS......Aquatic Induced Divorce Syndrome.
We've been married 13 years, so I guess it works for us. But then again we are both independent individuals that have different interests.
...and I'd add that if you're an Instructor, and your S.O. finally wants to learn to dive....
Don't teach them! It's tempting I know, but have someone else teach them.
When Janet said she wanted to learn to dive, I took her to the Keys and set her up with a female Instructor. I went diving while she was in class, best move I could have made, now she drags me onto dive trips.
On the same note, I make a point of splitting up "couples" in classes.
All the best, James
Don't teach them! It's tempting I know, but have someone else teach them.
When Janet said she wanted to learn to dive, I took her to the Keys and set her up with a female Instructor. I went diving while she was in class, best move I could have made, now she drags me onto dive trips.
On the same note, I make a point of splitting up "couples" in classes.
All the best, James
ToddK
Contributor
My wife and I both got certified in 2000 (she recommended the class! 
). Since then, I think she's done 3 warm water dives. It would be great if she didn't get sea sick, enjoyed scuba diving, and wanted to spend every waking minute on a Liveaboard, but it isn't a big deal that she doesn't dive. I have my dive buddy for diving, and spend time with my wife doing everything else. In the past couple of years it's worked out really well: we visit her parents in Gilroy, CA, and she goes shopping with her mom, and I go straight to Monterey!
). Since then, I think she's done 3 warm water dives. It would be great if she didn't get sea sick, enjoyed scuba diving, and wanted to spend every waking minute on a Liveaboard, but it isn't a big deal that she doesn't dive. I have my dive buddy for diving, and spend time with my wife doing everything else. In the past couple of years it's worked out really well: we visit her parents in Gilroy, CA, and she goes shopping with her mom, and I go straight to Monterey!
Joe from MN
Registered
From a golf teacher, but I think it still applies. Harvey Penick was asked if you should teach your spouse..."Only if HE asks".
Mandarin Goby
Guest
My wife and I have been married almost 20 years (I was 13 and she was 11 when we got married). We have so many things we do separately. I think running a couple of businesses together, raising our kids, and some common interests allow us to have our "separate lives." I'm a working musician. She doesn't want to go out late to clubs while I play. I rock climb and snowboard. She's afraid of heights. She has stuff she does, and I have stuff I do. Diving is something we MAY end up doing together. I'll hopefully be certified within a few days from now, and she's going to try a Discovery Dive (her first attempt was awful). If it's something we both enjoy, awesome. But if not, it's cool. We've always been supportive of each others' activities, and are secure enough in our relationship to allow each other to pursue separate stuff.
Princess...I know what you're saying, but seriously, unless diving is an all-consuming thing, you can find a guy who has other stuff in common with you. And I imagine hobbies/interests aren't the number one thing that must be in common for a relationship to work. It's more common beliefs and outlooks on life that are WAAAY more important, plus security that at the end of the day, you can find joy in each others' happiness that they indulged in their own stuff.
Princess...I know what you're saying, but seriously, unless diving is an all-consuming thing, you can find a guy who has other stuff in common with you. And I imagine hobbies/interests aren't the number one thing that must be in common for a relationship to work. It's more common beliefs and outlooks on life that are WAAAY more important, plus security that at the end of the day, you can find joy in each others' happiness that they indulged in their own stuff.
robint
Contributor
I am soooooooooooooooo thankful that my husband and I have an equal enthusiasm for diving. Every dive trip we go on, several men tell us how lucky we are and that they wish their wives would dive. Some of them only get to go on one dive trip per year because of it, some have to go someplace where the wife can be entertained for half the day while they are on a boat. They are restricted by having a non-diving SO. For us, our only restriction has been $$$.
If we had our way, we would sell the house today and move somewhere that we could dive every day - but financially speaking, its not going to happen short of winning the lottery. It is one of our shared dreams though, and every place we go we casually look into "cost of living". Someday its going to happen for us!!
robin
If we had our way, we would sell the house today and move somewhere that we could dive every day - but financially speaking, its not going to happen short of winning the lottery. It is one of our shared dreams though, and every place we go we casually look into "cost of living". Someday its going to happen for us!!
robin
Similar threads
- Poll
