How to handle non diving husband who is being difficult....

[Wookie]

Diving stuff should be easier to hide than kayaks and I have 3 of them.....

Store the dive gear in the kayaks...

Eventually you'll want your own cylinders, though..... They are kinda tough to hide.

 

[ladyfishdvr]

Eventually you'll want your own cylinders, though..... They are kinda tough to hide.

What? Those cylinders... Amazing how nice they look considering I picked them up dirt cheap from someone whose wife was making him quit diving....

 

[oldschoolto]

Store the dive gear in the kayaks...

Eventually you'll want your own cylinders, though..... They are kinda tough to hide.

Get red ones and tape a hose to the valve..... Tell him it's a fire extinguisher.....

Jim...

 

[bluejaykaren]

I am getting this attitude from him, and also when people find out he does not dive they have the impression I am looking for a man.

I can't see a woman taking up scuba as a hobby just because she is looking for a man.
I dive, my daughter dives, my best friend dives and none of us took it up to find a man. We took it up because we love to dive. And even though my husband is the one who taught me to free dive 20 years ago, he doesn't scuba dive. He did buy me a book on Florida Diving for my birthday and fixed us up a cart for carrying our gear for some of the shore dives we do.

 

[ladyfishdvr]

I can't see a woman taking up scuba as a hobby just because she is looking for a man.
.

I don't quite get that one either... How good can you look covered in 7mm black neoprene, with a hood and wearing a bc with a cylinder on your back cause where I am that's what I have been diving in.

 

[tkdgodess]

Just try explaining pool gear, rec gear and tech gear out drying at the same time due to a busy few days, i just hide it behind the golf clubs, plus im pretty sure my husband doesn't know where the laundry room is...

 

[drrich2]

Interesting topic. Brings to mind a few things I've noticed, on the forum and off it.

1.) Family dynamics vary widely between couples, including cultural and individual values and beliefs. Modern U.S. culture has been heavily influenced by the feminist movement, with a strong belief a woman should not let a man curtail her self-actualization. Then some traditionalists value family stability above most other concerns.

2.) It's not just a man/woman thing. There are a number of divers with non-diving partners/spouses. Some significant others (either gender) take issue with the diver running off on week long tropical Caribbean vacations without them, or leaving them to dive all day even if they go.

3.) I suspect fishing is a pretty male-dominated hobby; your husband can go on fishing trips without being in the close company of single women much. Scuba is rather male dominated, and buddy diving the rule for most, so you will likely be in close proximity to strange men.

4.) While some people believe partners ought to be 'secure enough in their relationship' to tolerate each others' solo trips, some believe opening oneself up for temptation is unwise.

My point with all this is to identify some potential issues, and note that different people prioritize differently. Some people will not tolerate being restrained in their self-actualization, and some will bend over backwards to avoid arguments and preserve a marriage.

Richard.

 

[nimoh]

I don't quite get that one either... How good can you look covered in 7mm black neoprene, with a hood and wearing a bc with a cylinder on your back cause where I am that's what I have been diving in.

stop it! you're getting me all excited

 

[Dr. Lecter]

My wife dives, but only likes warm reefs from a boat...she's willing to do it, but it's not interesting enough for her to put any real effort into it. Which is fine by me, as long as she doesn't attempt to control my diving any more than I control how often she goes shopping. I find those sorts of control games in a relationship a deal-breaker, and would react especially strongly to being on the receiving end of them from someone who has their own significant hobby.

Do whatever you think will work for you, but I wouldn't put up with the crap you've described, even from my spouse. If they can't act like an adult, they're a waste of one's ever decreasing time left above ground.

 

[nimoh]

My wife dives, but only likes warm reefs from a boat...she's willing to do it, but it's not interesting enough for her to put any real effort into it. Which is fine by me, as long as she doesn't attempt to control my diving any more than I control how often she goes shopping. I find those sorts of control games in a relationship a deal-breaker, and would react especially strongly to being on the receiving end of them from someone who has their own significant hobby.

Do whatever you think will work for you, but I wouldn't put up with the crap you've described, even from my spouse. If they can't act like an adult, they're a waste of one's ever decreasing time left above ground.

I agree, it has less to do with diving and more to do with mutual respect