Randy43068
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Happy birthday OLDman!
Happy Birthday DeepStops
- Thread starter Missdirected
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Happy Birthday Brian
All the best birthdays are in September!
All the best birthdays are in September!
Divergirl4U
Contributor
Love Making Tips for Senior Citizens:
1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.
2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)
4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.
6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.
8. Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too.
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.
10. Don't even think about trying it twice.
1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.
2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)
4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.
6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.
8. Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too.
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.
10. Don't even think about trying it twice.
Divergirl4U
Contributor
An elderly man goes into a brothel and tells the madam he would like a young girl for the night. Surprised, she looks at the ancient man and asks how old he is. "I'm 90 years old," he says. "Ninety!" replies the woman. "Don't you realize you've had it?" "Oh, sorry," says the old man. "How much do I owe you?"
shellim123
Look, I'm an atom!
Divergirl4U
Contributor
Senior Life On The Highway
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his
car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice
urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news
that there's a car going the wrong way on 280. Please be
careful."
"Hell," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's
hundreds of them!"
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his
car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice
urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news
that there's a car going the wrong way on 280. Please be
careful."
"Hell," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's
hundreds of them!"
Divergirl4U
Contributor
The Golden years are here at last.
I cannot see, I cannot pee.
I cannot chew, I cannot screw.
My memory shrinks, my hearing stinks.
No sense of smell, I look like hell.
The Golden years have come at last.
The Golden years can kiss my a!#.
I cannot see, I cannot pee.
I cannot chew, I cannot screw.
My memory shrinks, my hearing stinks.
No sense of smell, I look like hell.
The Golden years have come at last.
The Golden years can kiss my a!#.
Have fun on your birthday cruise.
deeper thoughts
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Happy Birthday
happy birthday brian...i thought you were wrinkled and pruney because you dive a lot - now I know its cause yer old hahahaahaha
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